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The Middlebury Campus 

Thursday, February 20,1992 

Established 1905 

Middlebury, Vermont 

Vol. 90 No. 14 

Planning document 
enters final stages 

By Mara P. Gorman Student Employment, said she hopes 

The Planning Committee, which die community will realize that they 
began last spring to create long-range can still have an impact on the planning 
pints for a variety of campus issues, process. 

presented a draft document to the die “I would hope that people whodidn’t 
Middlebury College Board of Trustees take advantage of fall meetings will 
at their on-campus meeting last week- take advantage of this round,” she said. 
end.Tbedocumentservedasthemajor ‘This is not just a done deal—there is 
agenda item under discussion. still room for dialogue.” 

The document, entitled According to the draft, which is 
“Middlebury College Long-Range dated February 14, the basic goal of the 
Planning,” is a list of specific proposals document is to present a mission 
for various aspects of campus life over statement for the college as well as a 
die next decade. It is the result of series of “principles, goals and recom- 
numerous meetings of the Planning mendations” in specific areas. 

Committee and its sub-committees, “The Board felt when it started this 
akme and with various campus organi- process that die College had gone a 
zations including die Student Govern- long time without this kind of evalua- 
ment Association (SGA) and the Staff don,” McCardell said in his presents - 
and Faculty Councils. Many of these don to die SGA last Sunday evening, 
meetings were open to the college “Decisions were being made in isola- 
community. don and the sense of purpose and 

The Board devoted most of its dis- mission were blurred.” # 

ZZSSXZtXl President Bush awards Point of Light 

in final form at their May meeting. specific numeric goals. The document By Kami Bedard teeta with the elderly who would like Middlebuiy College n 

John McCardell, chair of the Plan- itself is divided into a number of cat- The Community Friends Program, companionship, while “A Friend In- nation for the level of 

iiing Committee and acting president egories including curriculum, human ^ organization sponsored by the deed” matches volunteers with mem- mentoring programs, 

of Middlebury College, presented die resources, admissions, financial aid. Counseling Service of Addison County, bers of the community with mental those colleges or unr 

document to die SGA, the Faculty student residential and social life, and jugbeenracognued by President Bush retardation or mental illness. quired volunteer serv 

Council and to the staff this week, development. The spreadsheets include ^ ^ na«. of Na- David Meltzer, coordinator of die dents from those 

These presentations were in prepara- predicted student enrollment, tuition tional Service as dnrb7MiT>nly Point Community Friends Program in Middlebury ranked fii 

tion for another round of meetings costs, and budget information as well 0 f Light.” la a latter to lie Program, Addison County, commented upon the Tiffany Sargent, din 

which will take {dace beginning next as listing and prioritizing capital p.^s, its vohn- main goals of the Community Friends employment md volt 

week and will continue until the endof projects and their incremental costs. teen f w g„wnaiiy and under- Program. “It’s very simple,” he said, Middlebuiy College, 
March when the committee will con- Although McCardell referred to die „— ^ tr. W p nrii- “compassion and fun.” He addressed the most women mvo 

solidate its final document for the report as “asummary work in progress,” m the fact that Community Frienda re- services (not includ 

trustees’approval. he went on to add that “the (baft ia The President recognizes a “Daily ceives no state or federal funding and is mandate such service 

According to John Emerson, virtually complete; it states the mission, pofat of Light” six days a week. Daily supported solely by contributions and Cindy Bodette, a 
member of die Planning Committee the principle, the goal and the objec- po^ Q f Light refer to those individu- fund-raising activities. town of Middlebuiy. 

and dem of die college, die document dve, all of which leads to specific roc- ^ gr”T*. “It’s extraordinary to me,” Meltzer children who »e botl 

will he made available to the college ommendation so that the college can organizations that have successfully sdded, “that we can growup, go through the Program, but she 

community and many of the meetings begin to move toward its goals for die the most pressing social twelve years of schooling, then at least Sister as a child. “Bei 

will be open. long-term future.” problems through acts of community four years of college, and yet some- children,” she said, * 

‘ * service. Since he took office in 1989, times haveno opportunity to learn about thing to have someot 

President Bush has called on all Ameri- compassion and fun.” with just me. 

cans to bre^t TK “Points of Light” by He sees Community Friend* as a Although Bodetu 
engaging themselves in various com- unique opportunity for the college stu- in contact with he 

munity services that will benefit the dents to “really experience Addison Middlebury alumna, t 

needs of others. County” and for die town to become sitting with her, earim 

The While House Office of Na- “educated about the true nature of the and just talking. “Han 

tional Service helps to advise the college students.” she commented, “gi 

President on community service policy. According to Meltzer, the Office of confidence and attenl 

communicates his policy to the nation. National Service receives an average at the time." She I 

and propose* lr g i rifH™ to encourage of 200 to 400 applications a month Community Friends 1 

community service. from organizations who wish to be her children today in 

Photo by Dan Perregaux 

Students and trustees discuss future planning document over breakfast 

(continued on page 4) 


The MJddlebury Campus 

Thursday, February 20,1992 

\ r 

International News 

College Shorts 

Jen Kaufman 

Soviet republics make a genuine com¬ 
mitment to democratic reforms, attempt 
to establish a market economy, and 
recognize human rights. 

scheduled to continue next week in 
Washington, D.C., appear to be in 
jeopardy as Israeli forces and Muslim 
militiamen exchanged rocket and artil¬ 
lery fire early this week. 

die gambling operation, and if he^is 

Student reporter at 
Penn State calls white 
people ‘devils’ 

A Mack reporter for the student 
newspaper at Pennsylvania State Uni¬ 
versity his enraged many on the cam¬ 
pus with a column that read “White 
People are Devils,” and urged black 
people to arm themselves against them. 

Ill an opinion-page column two 
weeks ago, Chino Wilson, a sports 
writer for The Daily Collegian, also 
wrote that wjiite people created AIDS 
as a “diabolical plot to exterminate 
black people." 

University administrators harshly 
criticized the column. The president of 
the university said in a statement that 
Wilson’s column “is based on emotion 
and nfyinformation.” While President 
Joab Thomas said the newspaper had a 
right to print the column, he called the 
decision to do so “irresponsible.” 

The opinion-page editor of the 
Collegian said that the paper had re¬ 
ceived more than 130 letters and doz- 

a maximum of five years in prison and 
$10,000 in fines. 

Bribes and drugs at 

Armando Pay an, a former pro g r am 
specialist in the registrar’s office at the 
University of Colorado at Boulder, has 

U.S. and Russia come to terms on 
scaling down nuclear arsenals 

Last Monday in Moscow Russian 
President Boris Yeltsin and United 
W\ V FWEB&J financial activity asOPEC nations drew States Secretary of State James Baker 

NV-V — I_ T iS Srt / up a tentative agreement last week to agreed on a plan that would provide 

\ / cut oil production by more than a mil- RussiawithU.S.aidfordismantlingits 

lion barrels per day. This action is nuclear arms. The United States has 
being considered in order to ward off a agreed to supply Russia with trans- 

The Olympics continue In world-widecollapseofoilprices.Ifthe portation systems to transport arms to 
Albertville agreement is approved by the thirteen storage areas, and to grant funds to 

For the past week France has domi- OPEC countries, the new daily output create projects to employ Russia’s 

nated the international scene as the site would equal approximately 22.98 nuclear scientists. The Bush Adminis- 
of die 1992 Winter Olympics. Since million barrels. Analysts believe that tration has recently expressed concern 

February 8 , much attention has been removing at least one million barrels of over the threat of a “Main drain” of 

focused on Albertville where the best oil from the market would counter a Russia’s scientists who could poten- 

of the best vie for the prized Olympic declining trend in world-wide oil prices, tially seek employment in nations 

medals without nuclear capability. Yeltsin and 

Commonwealth of Baker announced the scheduling of a 

Independent States summit meeting between the two na- 

In Minsk, Belarus, a summit meet- tions to be held in the U.S. in July, 

ing of the new Commonwealth of In- During the meeting Yeltsin also re¬ 
dependent States (CIS) is underway, as quested additional loan guarantees so 

leaders struggle to deal with the eco- that Russia can purchase more grain 
nomic and social problems created by from the United States. Baker did not 
the dissolution of the former Soviet make any guarantees of additional fi- 
Union. Several cooperation agreements nancial assistance. 

Soviet republics differ on issues re- Ronald Reagan made secret 
garding defense, especially with regard agreements with the Pope 

Time magazine reported that former 
President Ronald Reagan had signed a 
secret order in 1982 which authorized 
the implementation of various eco¬ 
nomic, diplomatic, and covert measures 
to destabilize the Government of Po¬ 

Aid was given to the Solidarity 
movement in order to (dace greater 
economic pressure on die Polish gov¬ 
ernment and to further promote human 
rights. Reagan was hoping that such 
actions would weaken the grasp of 
Soviet communist rule in Eastern Eu- 
U.S. Secretary of State James Baker rope. Pope John Paul II agreed to co¬ 
traveled to Tadjikestan last weekend operate. 

with the hope of forging some U.S. ties The money to finance such an op- 

with the Central Asian nations, eration came from die CJ-A. and the 
Tadjikestan, Turkmenistan, and National Endowment for Democracy, 
Uzbekistan have expressed a strong die Time article stated. 

campus and to falsifying a student's 
grade-point average in return for 

Pay an was sentenced to four years 
of probation and ordered to complete 
ISO hours of community service. He 
must also pay $2,000in fines and spend 
30 days in house detention. 

On two separate occasions. Pay an 
sold cocaine to a police informant on 
campus. He was fired tty die university 
last summer after working there for 12 

Cornell cuts athletic 

Student athletes and coaches at 
Cornell University are outraged over 
$600,000 in budget cuts announced by 
the athletic department last week. Of¬ 
ficials said the cuts would eliminate 
four inter-collegiate sports, force four 
additional programs to rely entirely cm 
their own fund-raising, and require the 
department to reduce administrative 
expenses. ) 

The men’s and women’s gymnas¬ 
tics and fencing teams will cease to 
exist at die end of die 1992-93 school 
year. In'addition. the nationally ranked 
men’s and women's equestrian polo 
teams, men’s lightweight football, and 
men’s squash will lose their financing 
this summer. This cut will leave 31 
men’s and women's intercollegiate 
sports at Cornell. 

More than 30 students will lose 
their teams, and four coaches will lose 
their jobs by 1993 if they cannot be 
reassigned. The affected athletes and 
coaches on the teams have reportedly 
said that although it is not inexpensive 
to support an active intercollegiate 
atheleticteahi, they would do whatever 
they could to keep the ir programs alive. 

Funny festival at 

For the third year in a row, die 
Annual National College Comedy 
Festival took place two weeks ago on 
v As pert of the investigation, several die Skidmore College campus. Mete 

students, fa6ulfy, and staff members than 125 young thespians from 16cam- 

have been photo graphed, fingerprinted, puses across die country came to per- 

and interviewed. Many .of the students form in three shows on Fcbntaqr 7 and 

... a t_ a..__ - 

After the first week of competition 
Germany leads the medal count with a 
total of twenty-one, followed by the 
Unified Team with seventeen, Austria 
with sixteen, and Norway with thir¬ 
teen. The United States is in seventh 
place with six medals; three gold, two 
silver, and one bronze. 

Although the gold medals won by 
Americans Bonnie Blair in the speed have been signed, although the former 
skating events and Donna Weinbrecht 
in the mogul competition were not 
completely unexpected, this year’s to the creation of a unified army, 
winter games have produced a number Four of the new countries: Ukraine, 

of surprising results. With an impres- Moldavia, Azerbaijan and Belvua, 
sive record of 4-0-1, the United States are opposed to die establishment of 

hockey team has qualified for the up- such an army. But, despite die dis¬ 
cerning medal round. agreements, leaders have stressed the 

importance of preserving the common- 
Middle East tensions flare, wealth and have recognized that a reor- 

tfareatening peace talks ganizadon of armed forces is neces- 

Three Israeli soldiers were killed in sary. Establishing military policy has 
an Israeli Army camp by Arab guerillas been die primary focus of the nine- 

last weekend, proving that tensions week old commonwealth, overshad- 

still exist in the volatile Middle East owing die equally pressing matter of 
region, despite ongoing attempts to economic reform, 
arrive at a negotiated peace. Israeli 
officials believe that the Fatah faction 
of die Palestine Liberation Organization 
was responsible for the killings. 

Sixteen hours later, Israeli forces 
killed Shiite Muslim Sheik Musawi, 
the leader of the pro-Iranian Party of 
God, in Lebanon. It is not certain 
whether or not these incidents are re¬ 
lated. The Middle East peace talks. 

ag? mailed last month to the president 
of the university. 

College Officials would not reveal 
what the package contained, but Presi¬ 
dent Arnold )Veber wrote in a letter 
mailed to students that “the package 
and its message were unambiguously 
related to women's issues,” and that he 
considered the contents to be “a threat" 
officers were 

University polii 
asked to investigaie^after the suspi¬ 
cious package was delivered to the 
president’s office. They initially be¬ 
lieved that the package contained a 
bomb; although they later announced 

Prominent journalist discusses 
impact of Gorbachev reforms 

Visiting professor addresses the roots of racism in America 

blue eyes md light skin are all reces- why we are the way we ire *nd reitiem- 
five traits which disappear when her, “God was not drank that day.” 
matched with a dominant trait. According to Kali, looks reflect a bio- 

So, according to Kali, if every white logical purpose, 

person mated with a Mack “100 years Next, Kali proceeded to address the 
from now there would be no white psychological aspect of racism. He 
race.” Children from mixed relation- spoke aboutsymbolism and how whites 

ships would be more blade dun white, associated black with everything that 

“This right here is afimdamental key to was evil. He mentioned the connota- 

racism,” Kali said, noting that it boils dons of a blade cat and the act of being 

down to “pure survival.” black listed. Kali joked, ever notice 

diata“devil’sfood cake is black?" He 
asked, “Angel food cake is white. Is 
that an accident?" 

Finally, he addressed the sociologi¬ 
cal and cultural aspect of racism. He 
stated that we are “living in one of the 
most race conscious, racist countries in 
the world.” 

“America is inconceivable without 
racism,” declared Kali. “America and 
racism are like Tweedle Dee and 
Tweedle Dum. You can’t have one 
without the other." 

Kali is a supporter of Affirmative 
Action, but said that it was not enough 
to combat “260 years of slavery and 
120 years of pseudo-slavery.” He was 
shocked that some people are upset 
about such a minor reparation. 

He cautioned the audience to be 
aware of covert racists who, according 

By John Doty inter 

As part of the celebration of Black rica. 

History Month, Professor Gimbu Kali, 
program associate for the Center for 
Inner City Studies at Northeastern Uni¬ 
versity presented a lecture entitled, 

“Racism: You Can’t Stop it if You 
Can’tUnderstand it” inMunroe Lecture 
Hall last Thursday. 

Kali used a lively and humorous 
style and numerous sources to deliver 
his message to the Middlebury com¬ 
munity. Jean Taitt, lecture organizer 
and RHA for the Bi-cultural Center, 
said, “hi order for communication or 
dialogue to happen, humor is neces¬ 
sary to break the ice.” 

Kali ’ s lecture covered a lot of mate¬ 
rial about the origins of racism and 
focused particularly on the ingrained 
cultural racism of the United States. 

Kali’s seventeen years of research 
revealed a migration of African people 
to northern Europe about 30,000 years 
ago. During the last Ice Age, Kali said, ally 30 to 40 years old. 

“Most [European] people died. Those However, he pointed out that “For 

some odd reason this is kept hush- 
hush.” He suggested that the people in 
power have felt it necessary to with¬ 
hold this information, for as Kali rea¬ 
soned, whites “can’t be genetically 
mutated from us, and be superior to 

Ever notice that a “devil’s food cake is black, 
[and] angel food cake is white? Is that an 

who survived did so because of albino 
traits.” Those few survivors under¬ 
went a genetic mutation which 
“changed them from black to what we 
now call white,” stated Kali. 

He went on to describe how the 

environment shaped the way people us.” ming wrong witn us, ne poiniea oui. 

look. Pigment from melanin cells in Kali continued by stating that “All He mentioned how he was taught to be 
the skin is responsible for filtering ul- white genes are recessive. ..all of them, embarrassed of a broad nose and large 
traviolet rays which are particularly the whole nine yards.” Blonde hair, lips. He said that people have to realize 

Revised harrasment policy set for vote 

By Janlne Zacharia of sexual harassment under Title VII of the Policy Statement which seemed to 

The Middlebury College Sexual the Civil Kighta Act of 1964. “prohibit attectkmal reiariondups be- 

Harassment Committee has recently The guideline* defined sexual ha- tween faculty and studenti.” 
revised the Harassment Policy State- rassment partially as “unwelcome The original statement said that, 

ment of its May 1991 report. The re- sexual advances, requests for sexual “...Faculty and staff members should 

vision comes as a result of widespread favors, and other verbal or physical be aware that romantic and sexual m- 
concem among faculty and students conduct of a nature which constitute voKements with students are thscour- 
who had claimed that the original lan- harassment when such conduct has the aged by Middlebury College. The 
guage lacked sensitivity, and that purpose or effect of unreasonably in- new Policy Statement includes Jhis 
freedom of expression was not clearly terfering with an individual’s work phrase, however, it specifies the “su»- 

performance or creating an i n li mi dat- dents” as those “students over whom 
Yonna McShane, director of health mg, hostile, or offensive working en- [the faculty and staff members] have 
education and co-chair of the Commit- vironment” direct or indirect authority.” 

tee, said, “we tried to strike the balance” Arlinda Ardister, associate dean of The new phrase is alro preceded by 

between an unlimited form of freedom students and member of the Commit- the following: “...Middlebury College 
of speech and guaranteed protection tee. said that the Community Council embraces the ethical standard set forth 
for people on campus from all types of had expressed serious concerns re- by the. American A«ociaUon ofUm- 
harassment. The Committee sought to garding the protection of academic vastly Professors, which holds that a 
“provide an environment where people freedom. profemor. in order to encourage the 

[could] fully participate free from ha- The new Statement incorporated an free pursuit of learning, must avoid any 
rassment,” she added. additional paragraph which addressed exploitation of students for his/her 

The original Policy Statement only this issue. Included in the new Statement private advantage.” 
touched briefly on free speech. The was the idea of Middlebury College’s McShane explained that since 

revised Statement elaborates on the containment to “free and honest iniel- Middlebury College is a private msn-,. 
former by specifically referring to a lectual inquiry., even when the views tution and is not required to follow 

“reasonable person standard to be used expressed are unpopular or controver- Vermont law regarding sexual hams- 

in judging whether harassment has «aL” The Statement, however, also ment. it is the College s responsibility 

occurred.” Each specific case under said that “verbal contact...used specifi- to develop its own sUndardsofoonthiO. 

these circumstances would then be cally to intimidate or coerce and to Both the Staff and FacultyCouncila 

judged on an individual basis. inquiry and voted to support die revised position 

The “reasonable person standard” leaming...[was] unacceptable.” statement. The Student Government 

was derived from a clause in the Equal hi addition, Ardister said that many Association and the Community 

Employment Opportunity members of the community had felt Council ate expected to vote at the 

Commission’s interpretive guidelines dissatisfied over an apparent “tone” of beginning of next week. 

Lyons Place 

6 College Street 
Middlebury, VT 

The Little Store 
With a Lot, Lot More 

We Sell 

Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream 
(pints or cones) 

Cheeses, Candy, Beer 
Vermont Maple Syrup 
Newspapers, Magazines 
Milk, Vermont Maple Candy, 

* Best Wine Selection in Town 4 

Juices, Natural Sodas, Creemees 
Balloons, Honey, 

Ben & Jerry's T-Shirts, 

; Lyons Place T-shirts, 

Ch ips - - 

W And VV 

Point of Light 

(continued from page 1) 

Elementary School. He remained in 
contact with his Link Brother when he 

We have a great Deli & Grill 
With take out foods 

Come in for Winter Carnival specials! 


February 28,1992 

The Middlebury Campos 


The following incident reports have been filed with die Department of 

-1/25/92 One IBM keyboard, three IBM mice, <nd two Steelcase office chain 
were stolen from Voter. 

-1/28/92 The back tire and gears were stolen off a mountain bike outride of 
Milliken Dorm. ' 

-1/29/92The exit sign was stolen out of the Chateau leaving a large hole in the 

-1/30/92The North Dorm Annex Lounge was vandalized and cooking oil waa 
poured all over the couch. 

-1/31/92 Battell North kitchen was vandalized, a chair was broken, and beer 
bottles were smashed on the floor. ‘ 

-2/2/92 A Macintosh SE/40 Computer, keyboard, and mouse were stolen from 

-2/6/92 A video machine in McCullough Game Room was vandalized and 
money stolen. 

-2/8/92 Money was stolen from an office in the Athletic Complex. 

-2/9/92 Battell South second floor study lounge was vandalized; chairs and 
bottles were smashed on die floor. 

-2/10/92 ASorty portable stereo was stolen from the Green Room in Stewart 

-2/10/92 A red GIANT mountain bike was stolen from North Dorm. 

-2/13/92 A brown leather jacket including a blue headband and green neckband 
w4s stolen from the Crest Room. 

-2/15/92 A window in DU was broken when someone threw a rode at it. 

-2/15/92 The laundry room in The Tavern was vandalized. Paint thinner and 
motor oil were dumped on a table, the floor, a washer and a dryer and graffiti was 
prihited on the walls and bar. 

-2/16/92 The door window in Pearsons lower south entrance was smashed 
when someone threw a bottle against it form inside'the building. 

-2/18/92 The Game Room in McCullough was vandalized. Two video games 
were damaged. 

-2/18/92 The 4th floor of Hepburn was vandalized. Several trash cans were 
tipped over and tf^e contents were all over. A light was ripped down and smashed 
on the floor. 

If you have any information pertaining to these incidents please contact the 
Department of Security at exts. 5911 or 5133. We’re interested in your 
YiAformation, not your name. j 



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College alters admissions policy 

AP test scores may be substituted for SATs 





hMlmdli mm Mimtn t It Mi 

By Sara Switzer 

On Tuesday February 11, John 
McCardell, acting president of the 
college, approved two proposed 
changes to the college’s policy on 
standardized test scores used for ad¬ 
missions decisions. 

According to a memorandum issued 
by John Emerson, dean of the college, 
and Geoff Smith, interim director of 
admissions, the first policy alteration 
will allow college applicants to submit 
Advanced Placement (AP) test scores 
in place of achievement scores. Prior 
to the changes, applicants had the op¬ 
tion of submitting five achievement 
tests or their SAT scores. 

Under the new system an applicant 


(continued from page 1) 

sheets is the size of the student body, 
which according to the plan will be 
reduced from its existing 1960 students 
to 1900 by the year 2001. 

“We are not the only school think¬ 
ing in these terms,” McCardell stated. 
However, he went on to add that “for 
many schools this is a sign of crisis or 
trouble. For Middlebury this an¬ 
nouncement comes at a time of great 

“We looked at application data and 
made a prudent decision,” McCardell 
continued. “We want a first rate excel¬ 
lent student body. There is a qualita¬ 
tive difference, imperceptible to die 
casual observer perhaps, between an 
institution where astudent body is 1900 
and one where it numbers 1960. A 
person eating in the dining halls, trying 
to get into a class and who lives in a 
dorm knows the difference.” 

Another proposal is the reduction 
of the faculty and staff by 2.5 percent 
through selective filling of faculty va¬ 
cancies and a new early retirement 

“What we are looking to maintain is 
a smaller, more intimate more familial 
environment,” McCardell said. “We 
discovered last spring what we were on 
the verge of becoming and what we 
ought to be.” 

Chip Muller ’93, president of the 
SGA and student representative to the 
Planning Committee, said that he thinks 
“downsizing is symbolic of wanting to 
get away from bigger a t ti tu de." 

Sargent agreed with McCardell. 

“Right now, we have the chance to 

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Costa Rica, Dominican Republic, Brazil 

Work • Share • Live • Learn 

You can have a summer full of adventure 
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health for people of Latin America. .. 


Application deadline: March 1 , 1992 . 
Late applications will be processed 
on a space available basis. 

Write or call: 

Amigos de las Americas 
5618 Star Lane 
Houston, Texas 77057 

may submit, for example, two AP lest 
scores and three achievement test 

According to Emerson, therationale 
behind these changes lies in die fact 
that the numberofAP tests administered 
in the nation has risen considerably, 
mostnotably amongst students of color. 

Accepting AP scores, in addition to 
achievement scores, “would reinforce 
the College's emphasis on strong aca 
dcmic preparation and secondary school 
record,” said Emerson. 

The second approved change will 
alter the college’s policy of reporting 
the SAT test scores of admitted stu¬ 
dents. Under the new plan the college 
will release the score rangeof the middle 

go up or down,” she said, referring to 
Middlebury’s size. “During the eight¬ 
ies, gradually over the course of ten 
years, we grew to this number without 
any planned effort, and now we are 
bordering on being too big for the small 
community kind of environment” 

“Our feeling is that if we continue 
to grow we will become a more im¬ 
personal, bureaucratic institution, 
which leads to situations such as die 
layoffs last spring.” 

Sargent also added that she felt the 
inclusion of the staff in the planning 
discussions improved the negative at¬ 
mosphere which lingered in die wake 
of the layoffs. 

“This is the very first opportunity 
the staff has ever had to be a put of this 
kind of planning process,” she said. “I 
got a great deal of positive feedback— 
people were happy to see language flat 
was in the Staff Council document in 
the draft of die planning document.” 

Another item which McCardell 
discussed in his presentation was the 
proposal to increase endowment 
spending to 4.25 percent, its highest 
percentage ever. According to 
McCardell, endowment spending 
should not be higher than 5 percent of 
the income earned over the previous 
twelve quarters. However, it normally 
does not exceed 4 percent of the en¬ 

McCardell also mentioned finan¬ 
cial aid, which he said emerged in 
discussions as what he called the 
Committee’s “highest priority.” 

The document proposes in its rec¬ 
ommendations that Middlebury “rec¬ 
ognize and determine to preserve in¬ 
violate, the separate processes at ad¬ 
mission and financial aid awanL”The 
school should also “maintain commit¬ 
ment to need-blind admissions and 
meeting full assessed need, to the ex¬ 

fifty percent of scores, or the 
interquartile range. Most often requests 
for scores such as these come from 
annually published college guides. 

Middlebury College has recently 
announced that the majority of its ap¬ 
plicants submit SAT scores, and that 
the average, score is 1240 combined. 
The current estimated interquartile 
range is approximately 1150 to 1340. 

Because these scores adequately 
reflect the caliber of Middlebury stu¬ 
dents, releasing the figures could 
drastically improve the college’s 
standing in guide book comparisons 
and further assist prospective students 
and educators in choosing an educa¬ 
tional institution. 

tent that resources permit.” 

The spreadsheets propose an in¬ 
crease of the percentage of students on 
financial aid from 33 percent as it stands 
now to 37 percent by die year 2001. 
McCardell called this measure a “bold 
proposal” and asserted that “we mean 
to achieve this goal.” 

Members of the Planning Commit¬ 
tee are quick to point out that although 
the document is nearing completion, it 
is not finished. Muller said he feels 
there are still issues to be addressed. 

“Because of time constraints we did 
not get to student governance and it is 
not included in the draft document,” he 
said. “It is important that this issue be 
addressed in the final document.” 

McCardell, Sargent, and Emerson 
all stressed the positive attitude of die 
trustees toward the planning document. 

“I thought the tone was really 
positive,” Sargent said. “In fact, I was 
expecting a more lively discussion. 
Although there were points where 
people didn’t agree on everything, in 
general it was a reaffirming experi¬ 

Emerson said that he was pleased 

with the amount of student involvement 
in the pUming process. 

“I would compliment foe student 
body and the SGA on the level of their 
participation this fall.” he said. ‘There 
was a large amount of very thoughtful 
involvement and a huge amount of 
work by quite a few s tu de nt s." 

Finally, Muller emphasized the 
importance of die process. 

The fact that we have a long term 
(dan is an important dung; we should 
have along te rm pi rn g orn gco n stantly.” 
he said. He added that this is only the 

first step, that after the plan is ap¬ 
proved, it will have to be implemented. 

“However,” Muller said, “agreeing 
on a direction is a step forward.” 

For The Record 

SGA General Assembly Minutes 



1) President McCardell addressed the S.G.A. on the status of the planning 
committee’s report, and spoke on its significant points. 

2) M.C. AB. Pricing Bin was passed by voice vote. 

3) The Paddlccourt Curfew Bill was paued by a hand vote. 22 in favor, 19 
against, 0 abstentions. 


Four Volunteers requested far Lecture Committer 

Volunteers needed for Pub Advisory Committee 

President announced that only a few bills were submitted in January and that 
S.G.A. members should come up with bill ideas. , 

lineiriwe d Absences: J. Richards, TJtcmard. P. Holloway, C-Cooper. B. 
Meehan, AJCalaff, D.Diamonon. D.Guxtavon. E.Jones, B.Good, JJUmhart, 
J .Swanson. D.Gregg, R .Knight, JXafavour. AJtimom. C .Nelson, AJLopez, 
A.Emst, P.Harris, K-Holt, K_BeaL 

Agenda for Meeting on Febnwy 23: 

1) There will be a final vote on the Sexual Harassment Report. 

2) David Ginevan and Ted Mayer will conduct Question and Answer session 
on new ideas to improve foe Student Pub. 

3) David Ginevan win co n du ct Question and Answer session on foe Off- 

Campus Rebate Follow Up. ■« 

Danielle (JusUit'son 

Concrete controversy hits Addison County 

By E. J.Meegan 

Anyone who has spent any time on 
Route 7 has experienced the special 
pleasure one gets from seeing bigger 
than life concrete sculptures. It’s that 
of feeling, when Dad slows down and 
points out the 30 foot brontosaurs as if 
you hadn't already seen it Next, you 
marvel at what frivolous -- but prob¬ 
ably wholesome — people must be re¬ 
sponsible for whatever structure you’re 
gawking at 

Well, those were the kind of groovy, 
happy vibes I thought I was going to 
write about. Little did I know that in the 
coming days I would be witness to die 
ugly machinations of local politics, 
replete with zoning regulations. First 
Amendment controversy, and that ever 
threatening bugbear: Semantics. 

In fact, that word structure up there 
is among the major points of contention 
in the case I am about to explore. I 
thought that big oil lamp on Rt 7, 5.8 
miles north of Middlebury just held a 
Genie; as it turns out, it’s also brewin’ 
up a heap o’ trouble. 

If you’ve ever been to Burlington, 
you know the structure, or should I say 
“thing,” of which I speak. Out front of 
the Upper Room Design Center is a 19 
foot tall, 5 ton (according to the sculp¬ 
tor, T. J. Neal) concrete Genie. The 
Genie is riding a billow of smoke ouivf 
a 15 foot wide lamp and wielding a blue 
carpet over his head. If that is not 
etnugh of a description, this Genie is 
wearing green shorts, and sports some 
pretty crazy musculature. One's initial 

reaction to this thing is, “Holy-Smokes,- 

ing to Mr. McGrath, the Genie was 
constructed in August and September 
of 1990. with the help of about 20 cases 
of beer. 

T. J. Neal has done a considerable 
amount of work in the Northeast. He 
estimates that he has done between 400 
and500concrete sculptures all over die 
country. Most of the void cement stuff 
in Vermont is attributable to him. There 
are 12 works of his in Vergennes at 
Kennedy Bros., including the family of 
bears. Also in Vergennnes is a gigantic 
frying pan fully stocked with bacon 
and eggs for the New Beginnings Cafe. 

Possibly his most famous local work 
is a gorilla that stands in from of Pio¬ 
neer Auto in Leicester, VT. “Queen 
Connie of Concrete,” as it was named 
by a Brandon resident, stands 19 fed 
tall. Unlike the Genie, Queen Connie is 
solid concrete (16 tons of it). This 
allows it to hold up iu 1966 
Volkswagen. While this VW is indeed 
still vemugen, you won’tbe doing much 
fahren in it, as the motor has been 
removed and it is held in place by two 
titanium bolts. 

Neal's work has gained consider¬ 
able recognition around the country. 
Recently, his sculpture of Elvis, cur¬ 
rently residing in Illinois, was featured 
on die cover a book entitled Elvis is 
Everywhere. Well, so is T. J. Neal- 
and so is die law. 

The Genie is different from the 
Gorilla in more than weight Queen 
Connie apparently has a permit to exist 
while die Genie does not 

As with all earthly affairs, there are 
at least two points of view on this issue. 
First, I got to hear the McGrtth’s. Ap¬ 
parently, they had been waiting forme 
to arrive, because when I got to dm 
store Anita McGrath exclaimed that 

she had been wondering whenl’dshow 

up. Immediately, my media mmipula- 
tion defenses went up. While the 
McGraths are charming hosts, we im¬ 
partial reporters have to be wary of 
ingratiating and friendly people, fat 
between doses of populist righteous¬ 
ness, I extracted the facts. 

The McGraths established die Up¬ 
per Room Floor Design Center m 



1 ) 7 / ~ ,' 

etc,” so, to satisfy our prurient interests 
in this matter, I went in search of some 
artistic details. 

Theowners of Upper Room Design 
and the Genie, Jim and Anita McGrath, 
informed me that the thing is actually 
hollow. For more information, they 
were kind enough to put me in touch 
with the creator, T.J. Neal. He supplied 
a few more details. 

The Genie is made of 4 inch thick 

concrete, spread on rebar wire, lathing, 
and chicken wire. All die concrete was 
mixed and applied on die site. Accord- 

Val d’Isere France and the Winter Olympics 

By Brian Batter 

It's obviously easier to survive in 
France if you can speak the language. 
However, if you can't, like myself, 
you should by no means be discour¬ 
aged. I happened to be in Val d'Isere 
just before die Olympics and had a 
great time. But if you go there take 
your Visa card.... Actually, they do 
take Amex in moat places anyway. 

Having never been to France, I 
proposed to go and study die effects of 
recent political events an Olympic 
competition. After struggling to con 
vinoe this college's administration that 
things would be fine here without me 
(no easy task), I was off to Europe. 

The fust mistake I made was fly¬ 
ing to Loodon, then on to Paris, rod 
taking a tram to the Savoie region 

before finally finishing the journey on 

a bus. If I had known bettor, I would 
have flown directly to Geneva and 
then taken a taxi die rest of die way. 
With skis and bags this simply must 

damn jp part of a “beauty” shot on 
CBS, so maybe someone can tell me 
who the man is. 

The to wn is also marked with can 
that have been pushed into the river 
by the frequent avala nch es. These 
can reiterated die tact that the beat 

Thursday, February 20,1992 The MkhBebary Campus 


Survey reveals alcohol/sex link 

By Alexandra Ftyan 
ud Sally Keefe 

Is there a connection between 
Middlebury students’ sexual histories 
and their drinking patterns? A survey 
conducted in November of 1991 
showed that there is. We surveyed 20% 
of each residence hall on campus. 

First, we established four drinking 
pattern categories: “heavy” drinkers 
consume alcohol at least three times a 
week and have at least seven drinks on 
each occasion; “moderate” drinkers 
consume alcohol about twice a week 
and have around four drinks an each 
occasion; “light” drinkers consume 
alcohol once a week and have about 
one drink on each occasion; and 
nondrinkers never consume alcohol. 
Although we found no significant dif¬ 
ference in drinking patterns across 
classes, we did find a significant differ¬ 
ence between men and women. 

The fast question on our question¬ 
naire asked students whether or not 
they had ever engaged in sexual inter¬ 
course. Roughly 80% of the men and 
70% of the women surveyed reported 
being sexually active. 

The percentage of sexually active 
students increases with class: 60% of 
all flrstyear students surveyed, 72% of 
all sophomores, 85% of all juniors, and 
87% of all seniors. We found that 
about 88% of the sexually active stu¬ 
dents are heavy or moderate drinkers 
compared to only about 45% of the 
nonsexually active students. 

The students surveyed indicated 
how old they were when they first had 
sexual intercourse. We found dial men 
became sexualy active at an earfier age 
than women. Middlebury men sur¬ 
veyed became sexually active at ap- 
proximalely 16 1/2 years of age, 
Middlebury women became sexually 
active at 17. The age at which a student 
became sexually active was related to 
her/his drinking pattern. Heavier 
d rin ker s became sexually active at an 
earlier age than non- or light drinkers. 

Heavier drinkers lead to have had 
more sexual partners than lighter 
drinkers. On average, heavy thinkers 
have had 5.97 sexual partners, moderate 
drinkers 3.95 sexual partners, light 
drinkers 2.73 sexual partners, and 
noodrinkers 2.13 sexual partners. We 
discovered no significant difference 
between t h e n u mb ers of sexual partners 
male and female students have had. 

The students surveyed were asked 
about their condom use, we found that 
men tend to report using condoms more 
often than women. On a 4.0 scale 
where 4 (or an “A") is “always" and 1 
(or a “D”) is “never", Middlebury men 
received aB+grade, while Middlebury 
women received aB- grade. There was 
no significant difference in reported 
condom usage across the classes. 
Heavier drinkers reported using 
condoms less often than non/light 
drinkers. Students who became sexu¬ 
ally active at a younger age reported 
using condoms less frequently. As the 

number of sexual partner * increases, 
one’s condom me decreases. Of all 
sexually active students surveyed who 
had ever engaged in sexual intercourse 
after consuming two or more drinks, 
89% were either heavy or moderate 

As alcohol impairs a person’s de¬ 
cision-making capabilities, we find die 
relationship between a student’s 
drinking pattern and her/his sexual his¬ 
tory to be extremely disturbing. As die 
age group at highest risk for contract¬ 
ing asexually transmitted disease (STD) 
is 15-year olds to 25-year olds, we 
think that many of the sexually active 
students, particularly the heavier 
drinkers, we surveyed are at a higher 
risk for contracting an STD than they 
believe. According to one published 
report, of all die infectious diseases 
STDs are “...second in frequency only 
to the common cold.” 

We hope that our research is of 
educational value to die Middlebury 
community. Our goal was to heighten 
the awareness of sexually active 
Middlebury students in the hope that 
more will practice die three ‘Cs’— 
communication, caution, and condom 
use. Preventing the spread of sexually 
transmitted diseases is as simple as 
washing one’s hands. In the wards of 
health writer Jerry Adler, “Anyone who 
has mastered washing his hands after 
using the toilet has die intellectual ca¬ 
pacity to avoid most venereal infec¬ 


Winter Carnival Ball 

is your excuse to dress 


Stunning and 
elegant holiday 
fashions at savings 
up to 50% off 

_ Thursday, February 20,1992 

The Vermont Index 

The amount of tax increase voted by the Vermont legislature in 1990: 

$90 million. 

The amount of money given away so far on The Price is Right: 

$100 million. 

Of the $667,416 (amount due as of June 6,1991) owed the U.S. House 
restaurant, amount owed by former House members: $17,000. Number of 
delinquent U.S. House members who are dead: 3. 

Number of gallons of whole milk consumed per person in 1971: 29 
gallons. In 1991:13 gallons. Number of gallons of non-fat milk consumed 
perpersoninl971:3.9. In 1991:13.2 

Amount of hazardous waste you can produce in Vermont per month and 
still be exempt from regulation: 220 pounds. 

Percent of Vermont bottles and cans not returned for deposits: 15% 

Yearly value of those unclaimed deposits: $3 million. f 

Before the first quarter of 1991, the last time Vermont’s unemployment 
rate rose above the U.S. national average: 1978. 

Amount of waste oil Americans dispose of illegally each year, measured 
in tire numbers of times it would fill up the Exxon Valdez: 16 tankers. 

Year Vermont apples were first shipped for sale in Europe: 1892. 

Percent of Vermont’s apple crop shipped overseas last year 20%. 

Value of total apple crop: $14 million. 

Number of days Burlington’s proposed yearly share of the Hydro 
Quebec deal would light just one of the Work! Trade Center buildings: 


Statistics provided by The Vermont Index 

Val D’Isere 

(continued from page 5) 

spins and crashing into snow 
banks. It was supposed to be legitimate 
ice and snow driving practice, but no 
one took it seriously. 

Ski passes in Val d’Isere are sur¬ 
prisingly cheap at about $20/day for 
20 days or more. For $30 more, in¬ 
surance can be purchased that guar¬ 
antees helicopter rescue if necessary. 

This is something I highly recom¬ 
mend, as the ski patrol works only on 
an ability-to-pay basis. If you don’t 
have cash or insurance in hand, you 
may not get rescued. _ 

Severely Yours... 

By Eric Pnchner 

Psychologists call it “post-ejacula¬ 
tion depression,” smart people call it 
“omne animal," Lighlnin’ Hopkins calls 
it “the blues.” 

Men. I’m talking about die univer¬ 
sal sensation we feel immediately fol¬ 
lowing the beast-with-two-backs: 
namely, the reflection that, no matter 

what transcendental state we may have 

reached three seconds earlier, we re¬ 

main no more than half-beasts with 
only one sweaty bock to our name. I’m 

talking about the depletion of our 

physical purpose on earth, the realiza¬ 

tion of our true constitution. Don’t try 
and deny it—we are only quivering 
lumps of useless flesh. 

For some reason, the other half does 
not understand this: 

“What’s wrong, Dkkr 
“I’m glad you asked, Jane. In a 
nutshell. I’m experiencing the not- 

un common phenomenon known as 

post-ejaculation depression which af¬ 

flicts all members of die male species 
due to die existential revelation of our 

own futility and the absence of any 

teleological order in die universe.” 
“It’s me. isn’t itT 
The French philosopher Montaigne 

had a very hard time picturing Socrates 
having an orgasm and saw this as proof 
of man's folly. With die advent of 
MTV, however, millions of French in¬ 

tellectuals have been exposed to simi¬ 
larly unattractive men playing electric 
guitar, to tins sort of thing may be a 
Hole easier to imagine. 

The question remains, though—if 
sex is so great, why do we get so 

depressed? It boils down to this: all 

men share a common bond in that 

we all have a death wish. In other 

words, more than anything else, we 

crave the total obliteration of our 

Next time you’re having an or¬ 

gasm, try to remember your name. 
Try to remember anything. During 

orgasm, we enter a temporary state 

of Alzheimer’s in which we escape 

our own reason. Surely, this is why 

die amorous French term it the “little 

death.” Finishing an orgasm can be 

likened to those pained accounts of 

Shirley Maclaine disciples being 

brought bock to life by doctors across 

the country, much to their chagrin. 

So, immediately a propos, self¬ 

reflection returns and we must again 
face the burden of consciousness. 

This explains another pressing 

question often raised by our infuri¬ 

ated partners—namely, why we tend 
to fall asleep so quickly. Clearly, 

more thm anything else, we kmg to 

return to an unconscious state. Also, 

there remains die slight possibility 

of a wet dream. 

Through all this, we penevere in 
our attempts to relate: 

“Let me try to describe die sen¬ 
sation. HaveyoueverreadAfausea?” 
“By Stephen King, right?” “No." 

“I read Pet Semetary. Sheesh, 
gave me the jeebies for a week." 

After all. what’s a single orgasm 
(mortality) when compared to the 

possibility of multiple ones (rein- 

I found it most interesting that the 
Val d’Isere region is referred to on 
trail maps as “L'espoce de Killy,” for 
although Jean Claude Killy is French, 
he lives in nearby Switzerland. Then 
again, I also found a shop in Val 
d’Isere which sold T-shirts that read: 
“The U .S. A. Red Sox Football Club." 

Having returned home with my 
bundle of Olympic souvenirs, I wss 
slightly miffed to discover that the 
Olympic baseball hat for which I had 
paid 130 bancs could be purchased 
off aplacemat in McDonalds for $10. 

So if you can’tmake it to Val d’Isere, 
don’t feel badly, try McDonalds and 
tell everyone you were in France. 

Mon. - Sat 9-6 Sam. 11-5 388-6752 

Thursday, February 20,1992 

The Mlddlebury Campus 

You see, I have this friend... 

The Telling of the Urban Myth in America 

By Peter Harris 

Everyone has a friend of a friend 
who goes to school with someone who 
something happened to, and they swear 
it’s true. 


Yet occasionally (ami mind you I 
am attempting not to undermine the 
validity of anyone’s most heartfelt 
experiences) you chance upon some¬ 
one who knows someone from some¬ 
where who also happened to know the 
poor fellow with the alarming room¬ 
mate and his ether. A strange gather¬ 
ing of cosmic forces which only 
Leonard Nimoy and In Search Of... 
could unravel? Or perhaps a snow¬ 
balling legend travelling through pe¬ 
culiar clusters of neuro-frustration 
(called colleges) known as The Urban 

This is the first in a never ending 
series of articles devoted to furthering 
urban myths, in that be they true or 
false, we can extract the fruits of other’s 
wisdom from their pain and suffering. 
If you have an urban myth which you 
would like to impart to Readerland, 
please send it to Pete Harris, Drawer 

The Parable Of the 
Unwilling Donor 

I know this guy who lives in New 
York city about three blocks down 
from Times Square, and you won't 
belieeeeeeeeeve what he toldme about 
his cousin Dave. I guess they were out 
one night in the city and they were out 
drinkin’ if you know what I mean, and 
this guy, my friend, says that they’re 
genin’ pretty wasted, right? Well, as 
dw story goes, Dave meets iq> with this 

woman, who believe it or not, is about 
thirty-five and hotter than the hinges of 
helL She’s all kinds of interested in 
him and before you know it my friend 
turns around and wham! No cousin 
Dave anywhere. 

O.K., O.K., O.K. this is where it 
starts to get really creepy: My friend 
goes home and passes out, if you catch 
my drift, and when he wakes up the 
next day, still no sign of his cousin. 
Well, my friend said that he thought 
nothing of it. I mean you’re out, you 
meet someone, who knows, right? 

So a couple of days go by and my 
buddy down there, well he’s genin' a 
bit nervous, I mean where the hell’s his 
cousin, you know? So he calls die 
cops. He tells him Dave is missing in 
action and that he aint seen him in three 

Now you’re really gonna flip out 
when you hear what I’m about to tell 
you: the police call up my friend, O.K., 
and they’ve found Dave. Except Dave, 
aint really acting all that together in the 
mental sense if you know what I’m 

Turns out, Dave’s been walking 
the streets like a zombie far die past 
three days. Just out wandering wound 
like a damn zombie! The reason? Well 
as it turns out this woman Dave was 
with in the bar was no innocent angel. 
She took Dave back to some crazy 
place in who knows where, at which 
point all these big dudes who looked 
like they were from some foreign 
country jumped him. Next day, dm kid 
wakes up and he’s got one less kidney! 
Can you F-ing believe that! They 
drugged him up and operated out one 
of die kid’s kidneys! 

Columbia University 

Graduate School of 
Architecture, Planning, 
and Preservation 

Introduction to 

The Summer Studio 
at Columbia University 
New York 

A summer program giving university creoit wnich introduces 
the student to all aspects of the design, mstory, theory, and 
practice of architecture. The program is intended both for 
those without previous academic experience in design who 
are interested in architecture as a potential career, and for 
those with previous experience in architectural design who 
would like to develop studio design skills, perhaps in prepa¬ 
ration for application to graduate school 
Studio, seminar, and lectures present a comprehensive 
introduction to every aspect of architecture as it is practiced 
today. In addition, through field-trips and tours, the student 
learns from extraordinary examples of architectural and 
urban design in New York City, the world's preeminent cen¬ 
ter for architecture and culture 
Introduction to Architecture: 

The Summer Studio at Columbia Univefsay. New York 

July 6 to August 6. 1992 

Monday through Thursday. 10:00 am - 5 00 pm 

3 credits, studio seminar Tuition $1590 

Housing on the Columbia campus (if reouired) $600 approx 

, / For information and appl ications write or call. _ 

Office of Admissions 

Introduction to Architecture Program 

The Graduate School of Architecture. 

Ptanning and Preservation 
400 Avery Hall 
Columbia University 
New York. NY 10027 
(212) 854-3414 

CotxrSn urmmr/ « «n s W*"—» JMon'W* a W°w*» fmnnen 

According to my friend, this kinds 
thing happens all the time down there 
in New York. I guess it’s some kind of 
insane underground organ transplant 
operation. I mean, those things are 
worth a lot of clams. 

Dave's gonna be O.K. now, but 
man. I’ll tell you. I'm gonna be a bit 
more careful about who I go home 
with in the future. Who knows when 
someone might be looking for a quick 
brain transplant or somethin’. 


, (continued from page 5) 

I can not really retell this story, 
except to say that the movie is more 
about Bill Burrough’s writing process 
(or lack thereof) than about Naked 
Lunch itself. We see a tall character 
refusing to be a writer, until he begins 
hallucinating, at which point he is 
nothing but writer. He is essence of 
writer, for he becomes what he writes, 
neither realizing that he has written, 
nor that he has sent his strange manu¬ 
scripts to publishers. 

The mythical struggle between the 
bourgeois and die bohemian is an¬ 
swered by heroin. When he is not 
shooting up, he is a clean cut charac¬ 
ter. unaccepting of his cohort’s (Jack 
Kexouak and Alan Ginsberg) vocation. 
When he is shooting up, in his mind he 
is a secret agent in great danger. The 
film shines in the moments when we 
see his world of hallucinations clash 
with theoutside world and one is certain 
of his bohemian status. 

The difference, J 
would argue, was that 
one was intentionally 
transparent, the other, 
in trying to be difficult, 
became simplistic 

The first female character in this 
piece. Bill’s wife, rather than being a 
source of hope, is early established as 
a junky. Although she is not Bill’s 
enemy, her intentions are not neces¬ 
sarily lily white. Duly, he kills her. 
Later, die same actress plays Kathy 
Bolles, BiU’s mistress (we suppose, 
although all the gigantic insects 
crawling about make the whole affair 
quite confusing). Bill eventually kills 
her, md the message is not exactly 

The uncle in The Secret Garden 
allows the niece who reminds him of 
his wife into his life, letting her quell 
his anger. Bill kills his wife twice in 
Cronenburg’s movie, making clear 
that there will be no room for touch¬ 
ing scenes. I found that aspect of the 
movie refreshing, as The Secret Gar¬ 
den was simply too happy for my post 
modem tastes. 

Yet, neither work truly satisfied, 
each being too transparent The dif¬ 
ference, I would argue, was that one 
was intentionally tr ansp a ren t the 
other, in trying lobe difficult became 
simplistic. But because I think the 
issues posed by each work are impor¬ 
tant I propose a new work. Rather s 
mixture of the two, I would call it The 
Naked Garden. 

h The Naked Garden, Milton's 
pre-fad Adam and Eve would meet 

KiifMw rtr* jnnlri»d 

There the two would decide together, 
before meeting any snakes at ad, 
whether or not they ready waned to 
know k ad. 


From the files of Ellen 
McCrary and Amy Synnott 

Q: Some say that if we were to 
experience a nuclear holocaust the 
common cockroach might very well 
be the last surviving creature. What 
makes this filthy little creature so 

-Michelle “I adore bugs and 
little green things” Tlefenbrun. 

A: This invidious insect often found haunting old, forgotten Quaker Oats 
oatmeal boxes or piles of decaying wood in backyards, is actually over 250 
million years old. Its fossils are among the earliest known; and, from the 
beginnings of time, this testy bug has been the victim of insecticide rampages, 
lethal potions invented by man to exterminate but actually contributing to the 
insect's invincibility by strengthening his immune system. Obviously a crack- 
dweller, the cockroach requires no light, little food or water and is able to 
synthesize his own vitamin C sources. Nestled in dark, impenetrable nooks and 
crannies, roaches have chosen excellent bulwarks against radiation, undoubt¬ 
edly with the intent of outliving us all. Perhaps the cockroach will be the sole 
survivor, the last living creature on earth, the ruler of the universe. Not exactly 
an uplifting vision of the future. 

Q: Can you give me the background of R J Reynold’s camel trade mark? 

-Hester, the dromedary molester. 

A: The phallic laden beast of the tobacco industry first hit the market in 1914 
(the same year, incidentally, that some Jehovah's witnesses believe Christ 
received his appointment as the King of heaven). A melange of exotic ingredi¬ 
ents - not the least of which was the camels own native smoke, imported T urkish 
leaf — the new cigarettes beckoned for a novel trademark, something Arabian, 
perhaps. Accordingly, R. J. Reynold’s created the camel/pyramid design, a logo 
that to this day, has inspired avid smokers with its elusive, Turkish mystique. Old | 
Joe, a cantankerous old dromedary on loan from the Bamum and Bailey Circus • 
modeled for the package. Judging from the subtle silhoeue one finds tattooed or J 
his belly, one might hypothesize dial Old Joe fancied himself a bit of a sodemist. 
More likely, however, the naked man reflects the insidious insight of some 
advertising exec, who’d been dabbling, perhaps a wee bit o verzealously, into the 
portfolios of Sigmund Freud. 

Quote of the week: “Kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray.” 

-Tom Robbins, Still Life with Woodpecker. 

From Guinneu: 

The world’s most miserly miser is Hertie Green. Reported to have maintained 
a balance of over $31,400,000 in one bank alone, she nevertheless balked at the 
necessary expense of private medical attention for her son, causing him to lose 
his leg while she scrambled to find a free clinic. Though she eventually left an 
estate worth $95 million, she ale only cold oatmeal dtaing her lifetime - the 
expense of heating it up was apparently far too extravagant. 

Thit Week In History: 

342 A.D. St. Shahdost, Persian bishop, martyred. 

(Feast Day) 

1437 James L King of Scotland, stabbed to death. 

1600 La Voisin, French sorceress, executed. 

1792 U.S. Federal Post Office system established. 

1854 Livingston’s party reached Lake Dilolo, Africa. 

1865 Cape Fear River forU captured by the Union forces. 

1872 Metropolitan Museum of Art opened. 

1927 Sidney Poitier, actor, bom. 

1965 Ranger 8 photographed and then landed on the Moon. 

1970 Lantern Festival, marking the end of the Chinese New 

Year Festivities. 

Politics as usual in 1992 election 

home and watch television on election 

While people in other countries die 
for the right to free elections, less than 
half of us vote during the presidential 
race. We just coast through a sea of 
pleasant numbness, pushed along by 
the winds of propaganda and laziness. 
We are comfortable. 

With the situation as dismal as it is, 
it is not too difficult to see how we have 
politicians that are ex-KKK members 
who probably think racism is just a 
concept created by “pinko-commie-fag- 

It is all too easy to see how a person 
like Guy Hunt, a high school graduate, 
ex-Amway salesman, and former 
Baptist preacher can get elected to be 
the governor of Alabama. It is even 
easily fathomable that our Vice Presi¬ 
dent is a man who tells Samoan citizens 
under U.S. guardianship: “Happy 
campers you have been, happy camp¬ 
ers you are now, and happy campers 
you will remain.” 

You tell 'em, Dan. You can feel 
comfortable saying or doing just about 
anything. A Schwarzenegger Film 
Festival should be on cable on election 
day, so I’ll be too busy to vote. 

By S. Warner McGowin of the past two decades. 

Politicians. The very word itself Now that our leaders are constant 
conjures images of fat, balding bu- prey for die leering eyes of reporters 
reaucrats with gold rings and vague, and cameras, it is impossible for our 
diplomatic jargon. When I think of society to deny that something is wrong, 
politicians these days, I don’t think of Years ago, when news of J.F.K.’s lurid 
J.F.K. or Churchill. Instead, I picture affair with Marilyn Monroe held no 
characters such as David Duke, Gary more tangibility than hearsay, it was 
Hart and Richard Nixon. easy to overlook the situation. 

America used to be a country filled Now, though, we have T. V. images 

with patriotic souls who sat huddled of Mayor Marion Barry smoking crack 
around the television and watched in a cheap hotel room and pictures of 
politicians makeelegantspeeches from Gary Hart on a yacht with a blonde on 
the White House steps. No w, we watch his knee and a drink in his hand — and 
them hide their faces as they are es- now big bad Bill Clinton. We are bom- 
corted through a sea of reporters shout- barded with visual images that are hard 
ing questions about their latest sex to ignore, no matter how hard we may 
scandal or money funneling scheme. try. We try our damnedest not to see. 
We scoff at politicians' claims of but it doesn’t work, 
innocence in the face of concrete evi- Even with this flood of evidence 
dence. Reagan still claims he knew that many of our politicians are cor- 
nothing of Iraqi arms sales, yet most of nipt, we still do nothing to alter the 
America believes he’s a liar. situation. We seem to want to believe 

What has happened to our percep that these bureaucrats that make our 
tion of our elected officials? Why are laws are themselves honorable and law 
the words “politician” and "dirtbag” abiding citizens. We want things to 
no longer mutually exclusive? First of make sense, so we try to believe that 
all, the image Americans once had of those who hold power are worthy of 
politicians as philanthropic souls that role. If they are not, what does that 
fighting for the common person has say about us? It is this blissful igno- 
been shattered by the media explosion ranee that we pursue when we sit at 

David Duke Is no stranger to sleaziness. 

Photo courtesy Newsweek 

Jim McGrath told me that he was 
about to destroy it 4 weeks ago, had 
the wrecker and everything, but a 
bunch of people stood around it and 
wouldn't let him. Andy Jackson 
claims that that was a ploy to get 
sympathy from the media and that 
he didn’t even have die wrecker. 
McGrath claims he could get a per¬ 
mit to destroy it, while Jackson in¬ 
forms me he doesn’t need one if he 
has a court order. 

Here the Vermont Elks Asso¬ 
ciation enters the picture. 

They have offered to remove the 
Genie in the Spring when the ground 
thaws and give it a new home at a 
home for children with Down's 
Syndrome, Silver Towers in Ripton. 
This sounds great, right? 

But wait, who’s that? AAGH, 
Semantics! On January 17,1992 the 
court stated that die Genie was to be 
removed “forthwith.” Meaning, 
“without delay, at once,” not, “in the 
spring.” That is where events stand, 
at die precipice of another conflict. 
Everyone needs something to oc¬ 
cupy their time. 

bandwagon. Apparently a report on part thereof, for visual communica- 
CNN inspired 20 Japanese scandal tion that is used for the purpose of 
mongers to fly over for a look at the bringing the subject thereof to the 

Genie. The case has been featured in a attention of the public.” A structure 
hundreds of national newspapers. Of is, “anything constructed or erected, 

course not all the coverage is favor- the use of which requires location on 
able. the ground, or attachment to some 

Locally, the Addison Independent thing located on the ground, except a 
ran an articlecritical of the McGrath’s 
motivations and even T. J. Neal’s 
artistic talent. In response to this, Mr. 

Neal is of the opinion that the editor 
there is a “nasty dude.” Of course, 
partisan newspaper articles can and 
should be disregarded, so let us turn ■ c 
to the other horse’s mouth for further 
trial dirt .. ^^ 

The town’s legal affairs are 
handled by attorney Andrew Jack- 
son, who had wisely tried to avoid the 
press up to this point, but agreed to 
talk tp our humble paper. I hoped that 
absolute truth in this case would be 
less elusive in legal circles and court 

The law deals With semantics 
harshly and firmly. It says that a sign 
is, “any device, structure, building or 


The McGraths are currently circu¬ 
lating a petition calling for the repeal 
of the New Haven zoning regulations 
in their entirety. If you’re aresident of 
New Haven, and inclined that way, go 
on up and sign. 

So why are the tax payers funding 
all this semantic controversy? Well, 

Thus, die court decided in July of first of all, if we can belief a lawyer, 

1991 that, “the statue is not a ‘lawn the figure of $7,000 dollars in legal 

fees reported in the Addison Inde¬ 
pendent is wrong. The town has only 
spent $2300, tops. 

Can all this bickering simply be 
for free publicity? No one I talked to 
explicitly said this, but it is clear that 
these people (both sides) are not just 
fighting for die American way. It is 
more subtle than that (or maybe less); 
they are fighting because it is the 
American Way. ConstantconflicL Just 
enough laws to have order, just enough 
myths to havechaos. Sturm and drang. 
Fear and loathing. 

But so what, everyone knows that. 
We want to know what’s going to 
ornament' as such are community un- happen to thatcool Genie! Well, there’s 

derstood,” and that, “by the circum- plenty of conflict about that too. 
stantial evidence that the appellant 
constructed this statue with the inten¬ 
tion of creating a notorious dispute for 
commercial purposes.” 

While the law certainly has a handle 
on semantics, it could use some work 
with grammar and usage. Neverthe¬ 
less, the court held that the Genie “ex¬ 
ists in violation of the zoning bylaws of 
the Town of New Haven.” 

How does one counter something 
so concrete? The McGraths deckled to 
seize the moral high ground, or at least 
the righteously indignant {ground, by 
claiming that the very premiseof zoning 
laws is unconstitutional. While their 
day in court (January 17,1992) didn’t 
quite go their way (the court found that, 

“there has been no infringement of 
defendants first amendment^ rights”), 
they are still battling those Semantic 
authoritarians in New Haven. 

T. J. Neal argues that the term 
“structure” is defined loo broadly, and 
“allows bureaucrats to be able to do 
anything they want.” 

McGrath holds dial the Genie is not 
even a sign, because it has no lettering. 

Of course, Andrew Jackson declares 
that the laws were derigmut for the 
exact reason that these folks are ob¬ 
jecting to them: the zoning board wants 
everything to corse under its jurisdic¬ 
tion. That is why are have a govens- 



(Continued from page 5) ” 

gust of 1990. That same month the 
powers that be realized that this was no 
ordinary lawn ornament. Was it a 
jockey from Mars? a dwarf brewing 
tea? or was it a sign? Whatever the 
case, this problem was surely in the 
domain of Eris' faithful helper Seman¬ 

Confident in their laws, the town 
informed the McGraths that their 
structure was illegal. Confident in their 
ability to manipulate the media and in 
turn public opinion with semantic con¬ 
fusion and anti-authority patriotism, 
the McGraths appealed the case. Both 
parties were right in their assumptions. 
The town won in court and' the 
McGraths have created a media stir of 
absurd proportions. 

The coverage began on NBC’s 
‘Trial Watch” in August. From there, 
print, radio, and cable hopped on the 

The McGraths 
decided to seize the 
moral high ground, or 
at least the righteously 
indignant ground by 
claiming that the very 
premise of zoning laws 
is unconstitutional. 


■aria Dal LaarUaa - Downtown f Mg 

Mata l Margarita - Dowtown H jL il 

'Awaaa Beat - Beach Resort Q 

A^uanarlna - Beach Resort jy| 4|r 

OASIS Divine Beach Resort 

All Trips Indude Seven Nights Accommodations, Round-Trip Airfare, and 
Transfers to and from the Airport. Departure Taxes Not Included. 

Thursday, February 20,1992 

The Middlebury Campus 



Midd skiers gear up for Carnival, East Championships 

By Peter Webber 

While the rest of the college has 
been enjoying J-term and vacations to 
the sunny south, the ski team has been 
hard at work at the various winter car¬ 
nivals throughout New England. Since 
the end of winter term, the team has 
travelled to races atU.V.M., Dartmouth, 
and Williams. 

The U.V.M. races were held in 
Stowe and brought success for the 
Panthers. Both the men and women 
defeated a strong Dartmouth team to 
finish second behind the hosts from 
Vermont The Big Green of Dartmouth 
have a team laden with talent all the 
way down to the sixth man, but the 
Middlebury gate-crashers pulled out 
the stops and crushed them. The 
Panther Women were particularly fear¬ 
some as they dominated the slalom for 
the second week in a row. 

The team next headed to the 
Dartmouth Ski Way for the Carnival 
races there. Senior Erica Nourjian 
decimated the field in the slalom, and 

The Panther women... 
dominated the slalom 
for the second week in 
a row. 

led die team to another fine showing. 
The women were top* in the slalom for 
the third week in a row. After the race, 
Nourjian said, Tm not real imp re ss ed 
with the mountain here at Dartmouth, 
I’m sure glad we have the Snow Bowl 
at Middlebury. The skiing there is far 
superior to uiything we’ve seen this 

This psst weekend, the Panthers 
battled it out at the Willisms carnival. 
Middlebury fans will be glad to hear 
that the Purple Cows of Williams have 

received a sound beating from the Pan¬ 
ther skiers this year, and this carnival 
was no exception. The boisterous Wil¬ 
liams fans did little to intimidate the 

Middlebury skiers, who expect the 
competition to be railed on at their own 

The season nears completion this 

weekend as Middlebury hosts the East¬ 
ern Championships. U.V.M. and 
Dartmouth have shown their weak¬ 
nesses this year, and the Panthers hope 

to ski their best in front of the home 
crowd. With the NCAA Nationals 
only two weeks away, the Panthers are 
picking up the tempo. 

Squash improves to best record ever 

By Campbell Barrett the Middlebury squash team. Two 

and Amy Randall crushing victories over Wellesley and 

It was a great weekend to be a Bowdoin have brought the team to a 9- 
Panther — especially as a member of 7 winning season. With only two more 

matches to go before the conclusion of 
the season, the squad stands a good 
chance of posting their best record in 
five years. 

The season began early in Decem¬ 
ber with the first match against Tufts. 
Although the Panthers suffered a loss 
at Medford, the player Udder was not 
yet complete, and the team was short 
on pUyers. 

Upon their return from Africa, Kelly 
Rivers '93 and Marrett Taylor *94 filled 
in the number one and number five 
spots, respectively. Seniors CampbeD 
Barrett, seeded number two, and Sarah 
Ell wood, seeded thud, brought three 
years each of Middlebury squash expe¬ 
rience. Junior Sarah Swanz captured 
the number four position. Also relum¬ 
ing to the team was senior Mary 
Blanchard, claiming the number seven 
spot. Sophomore Amanda Stine was 
not to be hampered by a shoulder in¬ 
jury, and captured die number nine 
position. Rookies included senior Amy 
Randall at number eight, and sopho¬ 
mores Lesley Tomion and Amy McKae. 
Fust year students Mamie Viiden and 
Sarah Tuff, both with high school 
squash experience, joined the squad at 
numbers six and ten respectively. With 
the ladder rounded out, the team got to 
work and trounced rival teams such as 
Colby, Bafes, Hamilton, Smith, and 

Over Febnmy break the Seam trav¬ 
elled to the annual Howe Cup tourna¬ 
ment, one of the most prestigious 

squash. HeU at die YdeTwreatby 
<x-mtwmr4 on page 12 

Women’s swimming 
competes in State meet 

By Kathy McGUUcnddy 
and Corky Mother 

The Middlebury women’s swim 
team wrapped up its regular season 
with a convincing victory over 
Plattsburgh on February 1. 

The meet began with a touching 
ceremony recognizing the seniors on 
the team sx their last home swim meet 
ever. The contest was slao highlighted 
by an impressive mass of out-of-state 
spectators who traveled from near and 
far to witneat Middlebury's world fa¬ 
mous nautical exploits. It was the team's 
annual parants' weekend and the stands 
had never been so pecked. The women 
certainly gave their parents a spectacu¬ 
lar show by collecting victory after 

The first conquest came by (be team 
of Ion Foss '94, Giany Allen *92, Bryn 
Neobeit *92, and hger Land *95 in (ho 
400medley relay with s4.Z7.94. Close 
behind m second was the speedy relay 

Meghan Honan ’93. Laura Eckact 
*94, Megan Smith ’95 and Hemher 

Codcy Mather% swam a lifetime 
best in the 1650 free. She set anew 
pool and school record at a 11:33X3. 

Neubert seems to perform best while 
under pressure and in front of certain 
fans. In the same event, Wendy Eckman 
*95 swam an impressive 2:08.24. 
Eckman swam more in the 200 fine 
than she usually performs in an entire 
meet At first, the team wasn’t sure if 
she would be able refrain from talking 
for the full 8 laps of the race. Mysti¬ 
fying the crowd, however, she seemed 
to invent a new way to keep die jaw 

The contest was also 
highlighted by an 
impressive moss of out - 
of-state spectators who 
traveled from near and 
far to witness 
Middlebury’s world 
famous nautical 
exploits . 

jabbering in n 


tfonenarkcook,**-, crunto'f monUriei, 
And pxjmlen (urn i of *>jo ChocolaK^ 

W 10 

Thursday, February 20,1992 

Hockey pleases crowd with wins over Trinity, Holy Cross 

By Erin O’Connell 

The men’s hockey team inched 
closer to post season play with two 
lopsided wins over the weekend, im¬ 
proving their record to 17-4, 164 in 
ECAC play. 

Alter being on the road for much of 
January, the Panthers rewarded then- 
waiting fans with a Winter Termloaded 
with goals as they rolled over Trinity 
11-1 and shut out Holy Cross 6-0. 

Hundreds of 
Middle bury fans 
suffering hockey 
withdrawal packed 
Nelson Arena to cheer 
on their heroes. 

The outcome of either game was 
never in doubt as the Panthers scored 
early and often against their 
overmatched opponents. 

Hundreds of Middlebury students 
and residents apparently suffering from 
hockey withdrawal packed Nelson 
Arena to cheer on their heroes against 
Trinity. Though the hockey purists 
may have been disappointed, those fans 
who flock to Nelson Arena in hopes of 
chanting "CHEER, BOYS, CHEER” 
came away hoarse after witnessing a 
couple of dream games. 

Senior defenseman Pat Currie ini¬ 
tiated the scoring early in the first pe¬ 
riod on a feed from Doug Cochran '92 
and Tim Craig '93. 

Trinity hung tough for the remain¬ 
der of the first period but Middlebury 
squashed any ideas of an upset with 
two quick goals before the break. Se¬ 
nior Chuck Hibbet poked one between 
the pipes with a minute to go in the 
period on an assist from Todd Lambert 

Doug Cochran ’92 was intregral to the Panthers’ win over Holy Crass. 

Thirty seconds later, senior captain 
Kent Hughes followed with his first 
goal of the night on assists from Cochran 
and Ray Alcindor *93 to send the Pan¬ 
thers into the locker room with a 3-0 

The Panthers continued the scoring 
barrage in the second period as Craig 
and Hughes both found the nets. 

The Trinity goalie, who had already 
made 27 saves in the first two periods, 
started to show signs of fatigue as he let 
five of twelve Middlebury shots sneak 
by his pads. 

Alcindor led die final charge by 
putting constant pressure on the goalie 
and came away with three goals in the 
third period. 

Ina wild period, Alcindor scored on 
aslap shot after being set by Cochran. 
Two minutes later Alcindor me^ed in 
from behind an die net, received a 
pretty pass form Craig and aantiagral 

number two of the period. The Hay 
Alcindor Show” was briefly knenupSed 
by Petri Huovinen ’95, who scored 
twenty seconds later on assists from 

_ Pluto by Roberta Stewart | 

Jamie Wood ’94 and Frank Clemens 

Alcindor completed the hat trick at 
10:20 of the period on a feed from 

The Panther scoring machine was 
led fay Alcindor with three goals and 
two assists, and Hughes with two goals 
and three arasta. Cochran was a gen¬ 
erous man an die ice, and came away 
with five —itlT Goalie BrentTrachon 
turned away seventeen Trinity shots. 

Fans saw more of the same on Sat¬ 

urday as Middlebury shutout die Cru¬ 
saders of Holy Cross. 

Some new faces made it into the 
scoring column as Todd Cridge *93 and 
DaveFritzsche ’92 both recorded early 

Cridge tallied the first goal on a 
first period power play. Todd Lambert 
’93 and Neil Sinclair ’93 picked up the 

Fritzsche followed moments later 
with his third goal of die season on an 
assist from Joe Dumas ’95. 

The veterans then took over the 
offense in the latter half of the game, 
with Cochran, Craig, Alcindor and 
Hibbet wrapping up the scoring. 

The Panther scoring 
was led by Alcindor 
with three goals and 
two assists and Hughes 
with two goals and 
three assists.Cochran 
was a generous man on 
the ice coming away 
with five assists. 

Brent Truchon frustrated the Holy 
Cross offense, making seventeen saves. 

After 21 games, Hughes leads the 
Panthers with 53 points on 14 goals and 
39 assists. He is closely followed by 
Craig with 44-22-22 and Alcindor 43- 
24-19. Truchon has made 374 saves 
for a 2.64 goals-against average. 

The Panthers will close out their 
season with tough road trips to Babson 
and Sl Anslem’s this weekend, and 
Norwich on February 27th. 



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Thursday, February 20,1992 

the extra point 

The only color that 
matters is the green 

By Neall Currie 

Where’s Jackie Robinson when you 
really need him? More importantly, 
why should we need him no w, in 1992? 

We shouldn’t However, another 
barrier in major league baseball needs 
to be broken, a barrier just as ridiculous 
as the color barrier Robinson broke. 

The current flap is over an invest¬ 
ment group called the Baseball Club of 
Seattle. The group has offered to meet 
the $125 million asking price to buy 
the Seattle Mariners from owner Jeff 
Smulyan, who has been looking to sell 
the team for some time. If they don’t 
buy the team, a group from Tampa Bay 
is likely to buy the Mariners and move 
them there. Problem is, the Baseball 
Club of Seattle may not be allowed to 
buy the team. 

Sixty percent of the Baseball Chib 
of Seattle’s money would come from 
Hiroshi Yamauchi, president of 
Nintendo Company. Major League 
Baseball has an unwritten policy of 
local ownership, apolicy that expressly 
forbids ownership by investors outside 
the United States and Canada. This 
March, the owners’ committee will 
vote on whether to allow the Baseball 
Club to buy die team. 

The fact that this is even an issue is 
appalling. It probably wouldn’t be one 
if the situation hadn't come up at a time 
when Japan is being blamed for every 
ill in American society, but strenuous 
circumstances don’tmake xenophobia 
acceptable. The “foreign” money in 
the offer is represented by Yamauchi’s 
son-in-law, Minoru Arakawa, who is 
president of Nintendo of America, and 
would be die chairman of the group 
once it bought the ballclub. Arakawa’s 
company has a major factory near Se¬ 
attle that employs 1400 workers; he 
was educated at MJ.T, ami has been a 
resident of Seattle for fifteen years. 
That’s about as local as you can get, 
and it’s certainly more local that 
Smulyan, who lives in Indianapolis, 
not Seattle. 

Naturally, if Japanese interests 
control the dub, most of the profits go 
to those interests, but ho w profitable is 
a club like the Mariners going to be? 
Small-market professional teams like 

Seattle are practically charities any¬ 
way. Deep-pocketed Japanese inves¬ 
tors are likely to lose more money dun 
they make, and that would help even 
out the trade imbalance. Only if die 
team becomes successful will it become 
profitable. If dial happ e ns , then all 
is to prove that they can ran the 
better than die chorus of “bcarowners 
have. It’s hard to make a case against 
that, isn’t it? 

Another argument against Japanese 
ownership is a fear dial owners with 
broad resources will spend extrava¬ 
gantly, driving up salaries oatoflhe 
range of poorer teams. Bat that already 
happens anyway. Second rate players 
like Bobby Bonilla enmmut the big¬ 
gest salaries in the league because of 
the careless spending of “locaTownrn 

of large market teams. And does any¬ 
one think that a Japanese owner codd 
do worse dun George Stembre nn er? 
Sky-rocket ing salsriet areae nmplxrf y 
separate issue, and if team owners have 
a problem with that, they should simply 
spend less money or try to maina* a 
sliding scale, or a salary cap smular to 
that used fay the NBA; if fans have a 
problem with players’ salaries, they 
should quit spending their money to go 
see games. Banning foreig 
is a red herring; die two 
nothing to do with one 

There are loo many 
be passed up by letting an 
to allow foreign in v estment slip by. 
Baseball ii already wildly popular in 
Japan; taking Major League Baseball 
global is a dunce for malLm-fa* 
teams to become more competitive by 
way of revenue sharing. The for east, 
along with South and Central America, 
are iq>e markets for baseball; everyone 
stands to profit from tapping into those 
markets, and this seems Ifa a natural 
step towards making baarball a more 
global sport. 

Major League Baseball can ctdy 
hurt itself by succumbing lo a fear of 
“them” and “their” money. They’re 
money is the same odor, 
just as easily. If “they” want to 

United States, who are weto Wop 

Bates falls in game’s final seconds 

Park Drug 

Convnnlunt Location-The drug store ctoaea t to campus, mm 
aro located downtown at the intersection of Main St and 
Merchants’ Row. 

Convanlsnt Houra-8AM to 8PM Monday thru Friday; 

9AM to 6PM on Saturdays. 

Largs S a l a cM o n -Wa cany the largest sM a cB on of haafi and 
boauty aids of any store nuarthacofegs. Addtionaly. wa 
carry a iarga variaty of othar products induing Halmark 
gresting cards, fina fragrances, school su ppl ies , laundry „ 
detergent and Russel Stover candy. 

Prescription Oervlos As always, wa provide fast, frinntdy 
prescription service whh vary reasonable pricer 
we accept PCS, Paid, Medlmet and moat other major 
prescript i on plane. 


ball lean 
fact, hive 

games of 


t they do. 


die score i 
having tocallati 
the R 

their mow effective ! 
bound the ball. As piaynnfcerPM Casey 
"93 took his position an the court, the 
referee handed freshman Jason 
Prenevost (16 points) the bad to par in 
play. After the first options of the play 
failed to result in an open; 

hoop. Prenevost d el iv ere d the ball 
it was second nunre; Ins look was on 

The 78-76Middlebaay rickxy i 
the second time in 

fore deputing seniors. Senant/A 
Enroue Halfkenny, die team's! 
scorer wife 25 ponds and the fiat m 
line for Social Security, said dut Tti 
always a peat feeling to win agame in 
the last second - 
programUkeBales. - fail 
to the Bobcats aggressive style ofpiay. 
Halfkrmy alluded to one of the faa- 

asked how they prepared for the i 
end 1 


like The B a."Tin] 

Statistically, Middlebury md Bales 
played very similar games. Both teams 
tomplrJ and made exactly the same 
of shots from the floor, while 
the tame number of free- 
daows md committing an equal num¬ 
ber of personal fouls. The one major 
stat ist a il difference in this game de¬ 

cided its outcome: Batea shot 31* from 
the free-throw line, and was unable to 
convert any of their attempts down the 

Middlebury, however, did not es¬ 
cape unscathed, and tossed up their 
own share of bricks en route to a 60% 
Continued on page 12 

Women’s hockey defeats Yale 5-1 


Women’s hockey 
chilly state of 
at Bowdom. The 
record of 9-5-1 a 
imp rove d 10-6-1 
end of die 

home ice advantage, theyhad die fa¬ 
tigue factor working for them. The 
Pmrhers had to come off a six hour bus 
ride and were expected to p erform 

Unfortunately, this seemed too 
m u ch ask of the learn. Middlebury 
rhupped the game 4-2, and was outshot 
by the Pnfor Bears 44 to 26 . Goalkeeper 
Liza Baxter *94 stopped twenty four 
dans m a noble effort, while Laurie 
Oddoa *92 scored with an assist from 
Khtley Horton *95. Middlebury’ssec- 
and and last goal was put in by Margo 
Heald *92 with an assist by Kelly 
Heffner "95. 

After a 1-1 draw at home agaimt 
Yale earlier in the season, the Pmthen 
were given another chance to prove 
drew niperiority both an and off the ice. 

y’s few goal came from (he 

stick of Heffner on an assist from 
Odden. The second goal came on a shot 
by Horton off an assist from Heffner. 
Once again this rookie duo delivered to 
cement the Panthers lead. 

The third tally of the day came 
when Laura Copperthwait notched one 
up for the class of ’94 on an assist from 
Gracyn Robinson '93. Odden closed 
out the Panthers scoring with a pass 
from Msrgi Sheehan *92 and then with 
her second goal of the day which was 

Baxter held the Elis to one goal 
while making eighteen saves as the 
team coasted to a 5-1 win over the bad 
girls from New Haven. 

The Panthers finished their regular 
season yesterday with a short trip up 
Route 7 to take on die UVM Cato- 



Thursday, February 2t, 1992 

Leary and Kovijanic lead hoops in quest for tourney bid 

fondle d an in c rrdMr . week with big 
wins over Clark. Thomas College, and 
Ban Caroline Leary *92 ml Sladja 
Kovijanic "93 came an strong and con¬ 

tributed 86 ml 82 points respect i vely 
in the three wins. 

The team faced Clark, the fourth 
ranked team in New En gland, early in 
the week ml short one starter; Chris 
Pagano ’94 is out for the season with a 
knee injury. Middlebury showedgreat 

intensity for forty minutes with a vic¬ 
tory that was clearly the highlight of 
their recent wins. Posting an84-68win 
over the highly-regarded Clark team, 
Leary and Kovijanic poured in 71 total 
points and took their opponents out of 
the game from the start Kovijanic 

commented that the team “really oper¬ 
ated like a was a trig game.” 

Friday, versus Thomas College, die 
Panthers came away with a 96-61 win 
that was keyed by their 50% field goal 
percentage from two and three- point 
range, and 78% from die free-throw 
line. The Saturday game against die 
Bates Bobcats — a 91-68 blowout — 
was another big win with Middlebury 
dominating the game at both ends of 
the court t 

Leary finished the week with 86 
points, shooting 72% from the field, 
and grabbing 60 rebounds. Kovijanic 
had 82 points and shot over 50%; she 
poured in nine three pointers, and shot 
21 of 25 from the line. Both players 


Continued from page 9 
courts, the tournament consists of 
twenty-six colleges and universities 
divided into four divisions. This year, 
the Middlebury squad was placed in 
Division Two, a reflection of the im¬ 
provement from last year’s team, which 
was placed in Division Three. Over the 
course of the weekend the team played 
Trinity, Amherst, Colby, Tufts, and die 
Universtiy of Pennsylvania. With the 
team’s strength at the bottom of die 
ladder — both Stine and Tuff were 
unbeaten — they finished the touma- 

with two wins could put the Panther women In the ECAC tournament 

Photo by Ed Soh 

dominated in each of die last three 

Looking toward die final stretch. 
Coach Amy Backus stressed the ne¬ 
cessity of winning their final two games 
fin a shot at an ECAC berth. She re¬ 
marked that “they have come on very 
strong in the last several weeks — the 
Norwich and Skidmore games will be 
very important.” 

The team now posts a 12-5 record, 
and Backus noted that four of the five 
losses have been to nationally and re¬ 
gionally ranked teams. 

The team finished their home 
schedule yesterday against Norwich, 
and travels to Skidmore this Saturday 
to round out die regular season. 

mait with a respectable 2-2 record. 
The Panthers placed third in their divi¬ 
sion and eleventh overall. 

With home matches scheduled for 
the last two weeks of their season, die 
team will be focusing on their two 
remaining matches. Following this. 
Rivers and Barrett will travel to 
Princeton far die Nationals. As Coach 
Dave Saward predicted at the begin¬ 
ning of the season, die squad has a 
chance to post their best overall record 
ever. However, a win over Connecticut 
College this Winter Carnival weekend 
is a necessity. 



ContmmedRampage 9 

Eckman raced to victory in the 100 
frecataquickS7A7. Jen Parry grabbed 
third at a 1:01.62. The sophomore duo 
of Heather Thomas and Jen Foss 
crushed their competition in the 200 
back. Thosn aa ma gged first at 2:25.06 
and Foas stole Mcaud at 237.72. In the 
500 free. llcGHicuddy tmidwH sec¬ 
ond at 5:57.71 proving that when the 
going gets toqgh. the sprinters can stay 
in. She has since decided Out she 
would lirrlo keep the counting cards a 
part of her traditional 50 and 100 free 

Nancy Z aga mi '93 let down her 
hair and cashed in a personal best at 

in the200breast Middlebury missed 
its gr adu a tin g senior superstar, Leslie 
Jarvis, but managed to still sweep the 
event. Ginoy Alim won the event with 
a flashing 2:41.07. Eckert and Sheldon 
pursued closely with times of 2:42.28 
and 2:47.49. respectively. In the 200 
free relay, the team of Eckman, 
MeGiIbeuddy. Kate Albin ’92 (com¬ 
pleting the last leg of her "from Chi¬ 
cago. to Burlington, to Brown Pool" 
tnalhalon) and Neubert just missed a 
pool record. The relay cruised to vic¬ 
tory at a 1:46.04. 

The team participated in their an- the men’s shocking victory at their 
nual State Meet on Tuesday against state meet. The Panthers are now pre- 
UVM, Sl Mike's, and Norwich. The paring for the New Englands, at 
girls were fired up and hoping to equal Bowdoin starting February 28._ 

a’s swim team competed in the Vermont State meet Tuesday. 

Photo by Scott 

5 Park St, Star Mill, 
Middlebury, 388-4544 

Leather Gasgets 20-50% off 

Minnetonka Slippers and 
Moccasins (selected styles) 50% oil 

Selected Handbags $7 J9-$49 

Leather Skirls $49 

Leather Gloves and Scarfs 20% 

Men's and Women’s Waists 28- 
30% off 

Western Boots $50, $75, $100 

20-50% off 

20% off 

We have 



Continued from page 11 

shooting performance from the disrity 


Despite being out-deadball re¬ 
bounded and committing nine mote 
turnovers that their opponent, 
Middlebury managed to pull out die 

In his third straight game without a 
technical foul, senior Doug Ginevan 
(10 points) led the team in the battle on 
the boards, but because of a stalistkian’i 
preference for Baumann, was credited 
with only six caroms. Also contribut¬ 
ing in his cameo appearance was fresh- 
man Jason Cussler. Cussler pulled 

down two quick defensive rebounds in 
relief of Ginevan, and he converted a 
nice turnaround jumper to continue to 
baffle die Bales team. By playing his 
ownversionof what has become known 
as the “Helter-Skelter’’ offease, Cussler 
became virtually indefensible. Sopho- 

Cussler is an tap of his game, he i 
im possi b le to guard. You just neve 
can tell where he might be next.” 

The last-second win against Bate 
endedsfun weekend for the Mkldkh u r 
team. With the win die Pmthers hav 
improved their record to 10-12 an 
have given themselves a shot at a 301 
season. Following their triptoWillum 
yesterday, die team travels to Units 
College on Tuesday for their xeua 




Fully integrated study at British, Irish, 

New Zealand and Australian universities 


ion session 

Representative: Mike Roberts 
Date - Tuesday, February 25. 1992 

12:00 - 1:00 

Location: Proctor Lounge 

For ruither inibrmatton please comart: V>ur Study Abroad Cr-e on campus 
or the Institute for Study Abroad. Butler University. -4600 Juruei Avenue 
Indianapolis. IN -16208. let: 317/283-9336 or 1/800-368-665; Set 9336 

»y, February 20,1992 

The Middlebury Campos 


Danny and the Deep Blue Sea dives to emotional depths 

By Carl Foreman 

John Patrick Shanley is often jok¬ 
ingly referred to as Middlebury’s 
“playwright-in-residence.” Four of his 
works have been produced at 
Middlebury in recent years, most re¬ 
cently Stephanie Guay'sproduction last 
year of Savage in Umbo. Many of 
Shanley’s works are set in bars in New 
York City, ( Savage , Welcome to the 
Moon among others) yet he constantly 
brings philosophy and poetry to what 
could easily be a stock situation. With 
Danny and the Deep Blue Sea, director 
Sandhya Subramanian has once again 
brought a bar in New York City to life 
in the HepbumZoo, with an abundance 
of wit and nerve. 

One rarely finds a character in a 
Shanley play who is not seemingly on 
the verge of a complete breakdown. In 
this show, Danny and Roberta are 
clearly either heading towards a new 
beginning or a complete end. Chris 
Marshall ’94 brings a very dangerous 
quality to Danny, the animalistic hero. 
Roberta, die dead-end thirty-one year 
old, is played with an understated, 
gnawing self-torture by Adrienne 

The first scene takes place in 
Shanley’s standard bar, and is the clas¬ 
sic boy-meets-girl episode. Marshall, 
despite the lack of any marks, cuts, or 
bruises, claims he has been in many 
fights, and his Danny is convincingly 
“on the edge” as he enters the bar. 
Macki uses Roberta's overt manner to 
toy with him, and the tension mounts 
until Danny finally vents his rage on 

Macki had one of her most power¬ 
ful scenes in the play early on, as she 
tells Danny she “sucked off her father.” 
Her character constantly tries to deal 
with das traumatic event, yet Macki 
never allows her portrayal to descend 

into self-pity. 

Marshall had few “color” changes 
in this scene and it was difficult to 
watch him enraged for so long, yet his 
outstanding control kept the audience 
involved. As he begins to break down, 
his confession that his co-workers call 
him ’The Beast" came with a direct¬ 
ness and honesty which was perhaps 
the most moving part of the piece. 

The scene is resolved with Roberta 
taking Danny back to her room. 
Subramanian found the proper tone for 
the opening of the show; both charac¬ 
ters are clearly in need of change. 
Danny’s breakdown at the end of Scene 
One is the central event—it is Danny's 
chance to become a human being once 
again. __ 

The characters are 
heading toward a new 
beginning or a 
complete end, _ 

The second scene opens immedi¬ 
ately after Danny and Roberta have had 
sex. Here we learn much more about 
Danny’s character. Shanley is at his 
most humorous as Danny begins to 
open up, an especially convincing 
section occuring when Danny describes 
his fascination with the idea of wed¬ 
dings; specifically, that he wants to be 
a bride. 

Marshall is one of those rare actors 
whose vulnerability seems effortless. 
His Danny seems completely open to 
this new influence on his life (Roberta), 
and his radical character shift from the 
steaming animal to sensitive human 
seems understandable. 

The final scene takes place the next 
morning, and characteristically, 
Shanley has lost both his dark pawin— 
and awkward humor as he tries to find 


Adrienne Macki and Chris Marshall in Danny and the Deep Blue Sea. 

Photo by John Ervin 

an end to his piece. Although the scene 
is too long, Macki and Marshall both 
give it credulity as Danny tries to keep 
their new-found relationship afloat 
despite Roberta’s hesitancy. 

The most poignant moment comes 
when Danny spanks Roberta, in an 
attempt to help her let go of her guilt 
about her incestuous relationship with 
her father. Despite the scene’s short¬ 
comings, Subramanian gives Roberta 
the power to say goodbye to Danny. It 
would be easy to play the entire scene 
as Roberta “playing hard to get”, but 

we are forced to believe she means 
what she says, and thus can empathize 
all the more with Danny's struggles. 

Subramanian has also coordinated 
her elements brilliantly; the music in 
between scenes is effective, and she 
configured the Zoo in an exciting and 
new way. Dave Anderson's first light¬ 
ing design shows promise, most nota¬ 
bly his delicate use of color in the 
second scene contrasted with the harsh 
white light of Scene Three, perhaps 
symbolic of a jolt back to “reality”. 

Danny and the Deep Blue Sea was 

a Theatre 500 project for both Macki 
and Subramanian which they worked 
on throughout Winter Term. The final 
product was clearly worth the long 
rehearsal process, and everyone ea¬ 
gerly awaits the future projects of ev¬ 
eryone involved, especially director 
Subramanian’s upcoming production 
of The Zoo Story. 

Macki will appear in Mademoiselle 
Colombe in the spring, and Chris 
Marshall is a com pan y member in the 
new campus group, the Immediate 
Theatre Experiment. 

From Ethan Allen to Ben & Jerry 

By Katharine Loos 

The new art exhibit in Johnson 
Memorial Gallery examines Vermont 
history, from Ethan Allen to Ben and 
Jerry, with a fascinating and some¬ 
times disquieting perspective. Running 
from February 9th through April 5 th, 
“Celebrating Vermont: Myths and 
Realities” presents Vermont through 
art and relics and questions our as¬ 
sumptions about the Green Mountain 

Vermont hero Ethan Allen is rep 
resented by two artifacts in the exhibit. 
First, a hickory musket circa 1770, is 
thought to have belonged to the famous 
Green Mountain boy. This weapon 
instills pride in the onlooker, areminder 
of die rebellious effort of Allen and his 

But placed right beside the musket 
is a reminder of another sort: a letter 
signed by Allen authorizing the pun¬ 
ishment fay whipping and exile of a 
man who had opposed him. 

As people settled in Vermont, they 
had varying degrees of success taming 
the land and building their fortunes. 
One sign of wealth in the early 1800’a 
was the family portrait An important 
example of this is Titus Hutchinson 
Family” by Thomas Ware, painted in 
Woodstock c. 1820-1825. 

The gallery description calls this 
work “the most ambitious family por¬ 
trait painted in the sue during the 
nineteenth century.” As with other 
ex a m ples at early American portrai¬ 
ture, this painting shows off the wealth 
of the family through the atten ti on to 
the clothing of the family members. 

stains of the family, but it does not 

represent the life of the average Ver¬ 
monter of the nineteenth century. 

The photograph “Worker from 
Eureka Quarry”, North Foultney, c. 
1900, better represents the lives of Ver¬ 
monters. Even the frame has been 
carved from Vermont slate, which lends 
prestige to the quarry worker. 

In addition to tackling issues of 
social status and realities of political 
struggle, the exhibit confronts the 
twentieth century myth of “pastoral 
Arcadia.” The beautiful landscape 
Vermont is known for often obscures 
other aspects of Vermont life. 

Luigi Lucioni’s “Village of Stowe, 
Vt.”(1931) renders the quaint village 
with delicacy as it nestles itself in a 
valley with Mount Mansfield looming 
in the background. Lucioni puts “man 
and nature side by side in perfect har¬ 

But this work obscures important 
truths about Vermont in this century; 
two years after this picture was painted 
Stowe began constructing the ski re¬ 
sorts it is famous for today .The mythof 
pastoral Arcadia, capturod in "Vifl^e 
of Stowe, Vl”, melts away when the 
exhibit confronts the myth with reality. 

Another panning. “Church Supper” 
by Paul Sample, shows changes in Ver¬ 
mont life in this century. An important 
tradition in Vermont is the church 
supper where Vermonters of all ^es, 
shapes and sizes mingle. Sample makes 
no tftempt to idealize the biocky figures, 
many of whom are frowning or staring 
into the distance where are fee ■ 

a complex vision of Vermont 

Change and commercialism are is¬ 
sues that Vermont is dealing with to¬ 
day. The giant, flag-painted “Peace 
Hand Puppet”, by the Bread and Pup¬ 
pet Theater. Glover, c. 1972, was a 
representation of the political activism 
of the 1960's and 1970’s. The exhibit 
includes this piece to highlight activism 
in Vermont something that might be 
obscured by the perceived isolation of 

Another example of activism is the 
work Ben and Jerry's has done to pre¬ 
serve the environment. They have in¬ 
corporated the artwork of Woody 
Jackson into their image and cause, as 
shown by Ben and Jerry's “Ice Cream 
Bag”, Waterbury, 1990. Jackson’s de¬ 
piction of Vermont is idyllic, a vision 
of America that is important in our 
history but fading fast in < 

Other ice crea 
T% for Peace Rip." i 

graveyard, grvaag a 

of place and 

In looking at Vermont's' 
and artifaett, it is crucial to focus 
Vermont’s Native American tribe 
Abenaki Nation. Showing a aaap of the 
sparsely sealed Vermont area, to gal¬ 
lery description deals with the myth 
that settlers believed that Vermont wm 

“theirs for the taking and making.” 

A “Beaded Reticule” C. 1880. ex 
e mplifW afl M tTaftwi a n rhi | i of fee tribe. 
Alio shown ie a mask. “Samoact”. by 
Gerald Rancomt Tsonricwa. c. 1985. 
The ax M bi t d es crib ee the artist as “a 
model for the yowi* people of the 
The merit is a tradi- 
et ample, harm hair and 

>r. ’• 

\ r* 

' V - 

page 14 

The Middlebury Camp— 

Thursday, February 20,1992 

Southpaw Salmon mixes the blues with the classics 

By Josh Barnes 

These days, many college bands 
are into high-speed, high-angst 
thrash and grunge, bass-thumping 
funk-blues fusion, or paying homage 
to the Grateful Dead. After awhile, 
it all gets old, and with the current 
popularity of Nirvana and Blues 
Traveler, one rww band will be just 
like the other. Playing, or trying to 
play, the blues has never been a 
trend. Southpaw Salmon might be¬ 
come Midd's only true blues band. 

The Salmons came together as a 
unit in late October, when lead gui¬ 
tarist and harmonica man Pat La tell a 
'93 and keyboardist Todd 
Schuerhoff '93 were looking for 
something better to do. Sax man 
Porter Fox '94 and first-time lead 
vocalist-wardrobe coordinator Josh 
Chapin '94 had the same interest, so 
the foursome joined forces.. 

Almost immediately, the fledg¬ 
ling group added rhythm guitarist 
Will Kirkpatrick '95, drummer Luke 
Siegfried '95, and after the first 
bassist vanished, Dave Morgan '95 
took over. 

The origin of the band’s name, 
strangely reminiscent of an episode 
of “Babe Winkleman’s American 
Fishin’,” will remain a mystery, as 
the Salmons had no comment when 
asked about it 

When asked what the Salmons’ 
music leans toward, Latella replied, 
“Heavy blues.” Judging by their set 
this past Friday night atTheTavem, 
the blues is unmistakably in there 

Leading off with a little lounge 
act theme, the Salmons began things 
for real with a bluesy shuffle that 
gave all the players a chance to loosen 
up. Chapin appeared on the dance 
floor at this time, truly resplendent 
in a “SuperFly” wig and Pat Boone 
style plaid trousers. After what could 
only be described as performance 
art, Chapin found the mike and joined 
the rest of the band. 

Although the mix was often 
marred by muddy vocals, the 
Salmons proved they can definitely 
play. Highlights of the show included 

a grinding cover of the Doors’ “Five 
To One”, and a confident, rampaging 
“Sympathy For The Devil” that the 
Salmons stretched into an extended 
jam that ranged from classic Stones 
feel to die down and dirty stomp of the 
John Lee Hooker beat. 

Fox brought his sax through some 
great solos, and Latella showed off 
fierce harmonica licks and treated the 
song with thick. Memphis-spirited 
slide guitar. During Latella’s mouth 
harp attacks, Kirkpatrick was no 
slouch, firing off some nice riffs of his 
own. Morgan played steady, no gim¬ 
micks bass, and SchuerhofTs playing 
was polished, but never predictable. 
Meanwhile, Siegfried assaulted the 
skins as if his playing was prescribed 

Other songs were not quite as pol¬ 
ished, but all contained moments 
where the blues that the Salmons in¬ 
tend to play found its way out of the 

When Chapin felt confident of his 
vocals, as in “Jealous Again”, he 
jumped into the crowd to belt it out. 
One song the Salmons should leave 
behind next show is Guns N* Roses’ 
“UsedTo Love HerfHadTo Kill Her)”. 
Imagine Axl Rose finally getting the 
lithium hefieeds, being backed up by 
“Can’t Buy Me Love” era Beatles, 
and deciding to sing "That’s Am ore” 
in the middle. Fortunately, that was 
the only embarrassment in an other¬ 
wise impressive outing. 

If Southpaw Salmon wants to play 
the blues, they’re close to it. More 
time onstage should help diem find 
the style for good. For now, they are a 
good, fun band with a lot of alterna¬ 
tives to digging into the classic rock 
songbook. Before Morrison did “Back 
Door Man”, there was Howlin’ Wolf. 
A little Blues archaeology might serve 
the Salmons well. 

Having a sax player around opens 
up the avenue to the great R&B of 
Booker T. and the M.G.'s, Otis 
Redding, Sam and Dave. Those are 
just a couple of ways that the Salmons 
could really distinguish themselves in 
a campus music scene that is only 
sometimes exciting. 

The 1991-92 yearbook staff seeks help? 

Photo Editor- We are looking for someone with strong 
darkroom skills and lots of energy to work as Co-Editor for the 
rest of the year. Hie time commitment is substantial, yet not 

All interested students (underclassmen are encouraged) should 
pick up an application at the Information Desk in McCullough. If 
vyou have any questions, contact Stacey Maichak at x. 7000. ) 

Members of Southpaw Salmon. 

Photo by Ed Soh 

Thompson Triumphs with Rumor 

By John Colpltts 

In the world of rock music, there is no 
artist so underrated and unrecognized as 
Richard Thompson. Thompson’s initiation 
began almost twenty-five years ago when 
i«e was one of the founding members of the 
ground-breaking English folk rock group 
of the late sixties, Fairport Convention. 
After leaving the group in the early seven¬ 
ties, he went on to record a series of excel¬ 
lent albums with his wife Linda, climaxing 
with the chronicle of their painful marriage 
break-up: Shoot Out the lights . 

Since the break-up he hasrecordedmany 
notable solo albums. Thompson’s obscure 
Irish-roots rock sound has kept him from 
fame overseas and even now he remains an 
artist with a small but dedicated cult fol¬ 
lowing. Thompson is an artist, who, al¬ 
though he has never been fully appreciated, 
has not bowed to the commercial demons 
that haunt m any legitimate recording artists 
of the last decade. Even with the advent of 
high technology recording techniques that 
hide as much as they clean the sound, 
Thompson has proven that he is an artist 
with an integrity beyond that of his con¬ 

Although Thompson has been record¬ 
ing constantly for the past twenty -five years, 
the release of his latest album Rumor and 
Sigh, can be seen as a comeback of sorts. 
The album's atmosphere is fresh, experi¬ 
mental and Thompson seems to be having 
a great time with the material. His enthusi¬ 
asm is infectious and even the most bitter 
tunes have an understated 

Rumor and Sigh is a breathless jour¬ 
ney through tales of youth, love, bit¬ 
terness and death, backed by a band 
of overwhelming talent and musical 
sense. Thompson’s voice moans and 
screams, his guitar wails and stabs all 
to the driving rhythm of drummers 
Mickey Curry ata Jim Kellner and 
bassist Jerry Scheff. With a few ex¬ 
ceptions, the songs on die album are 
well written and realized, which for 
old fans is a joy to behold. On older 
Thompson albums, great songs are 
sometimes maned by poor vocal in¬ 
terpretations by his wife Linda and by 
uninspired backing musicians. On 
Rumor and Sigh Thompson’s band 
works magic. 

The album opens with three songs 
Thompson previously released as 
singles, “Read About Love”, “I Feel 
So Good”, and “I Misunderstood”, 
all great and all with transcendent 
Thompson guitar solos. “Read About 
Love”, a song about the ignorance of 
young men and relationships, is a 
perfect album opener. The tune is 
undeniably catchy and the groove is 
hard and burning, defining the 

album’s sound. Other highlights are 
“Why Must I Plead”, “Backlash Love 
Affair” and two acoustic gems, "1952 
Vincent Black Lightning” and “God 
Loves a Drunk”. 

Rumor and Sigh 's message could 
have been strengthened with some mi¬ 
nor editing. The album clocks in at over 
an hour and some of the material does 

interrupted by two non sequiturs, 
“Don’t Sit on My Jimmy Shands” and 
“Psycho Street”, both are biting and 
surreal but distract from the stronger 

These, however, are minor prob¬ 
lems with an otherwise excellent re¬ 
lease. Thompson may be the best singer 
and writer of love-gone-bad this sideof 
early Joni Mitchell. Each song sharply 
highlights aspects of relationships, full 
of pain and beyond remedy. He writes 
in his music what he cannot communi¬ 
cate with words alone. As long-time 
Thompson fans know, he earns and 
proves his words with his music. 
Thompson is truly a great artist and his 
latest album only confirms this fact 



68 Main St. • Middleburv. VT 05753 

Limited Quantities 
Offer Good While Supply Lasts 







$55 plain 


Columbia attracts aspiring architects 

The Columbia University’s pre-architecture program held a recruitment 
meeting for hopefuls on Friday, Febuary 14 at Hamlin SDU. Linda Gatter, a 
representative for the progam, spoke and answered questions about Columbia’s 
unique program. Interested students have die opportunity to spend a summer 
or fall semester at Columbia’s campus in New York City. 

The second semester is spent in Paris, where students learn not just from 
the faculty but from the architecture surrounding them as well. Several 
Middlebury students have participated in this artistic and academic challenge. 
Any and all interested aspiring architects may contact Professor Glen Andres, 
Art Department, ext. 5226. 

photo by Karl Pelletier 

Wild and witty improv by the Otter Nonsense Players 

By Kate Ffolllott of words associated with t^whing it 

The Otter Nonsense Players* per- The players were then asked to apt out 
formance on Thursday, February 13 die scene without using any of the 
was so riotously funny that I forgot to agreeduponwords. When they slipped, 
take notes for this review. The crew they were penalized by having to stand 
combined natural talent with comic on one leg, then hop on one leg for die 
timing, courage and energy to ignite second offense. Finally, for a third of- 
McCullough for the hour-long impro- fense, they had to spit over their 
visational performance. shoulder. Naturally, the actors mkM 

The show was a welcome for our up presenting the scene while hopping 
new Febs, and the first skit enumerated and spitting. You had to be there, 
some of the more overwhelming as- Between skits, they had “Quick 
pects of arriving atMiddlebury. While Takes.” One of these was a series of 
one student set forward the barrage of blonde jokes, delivered of course by 
numbers we atMiddlebury are greeted two of the company’s blondes, with 

with—PIN codes, and access codes, mismatched jokes and punchlines. My 

and mailbox numbers and combine- favorite quick take was a mock adver- 

tions, and student identification num- dsement for Tide, which ran some- 
bers—the second student, over- thing like this: “Dear Tide, my daugh- 

whelmed, finally screamed “What size ter had die nerve to borrow my blouse 

underwear do I wear?!?” die day she was shot (Visuals). She 

Most of the evening’s skits incor- didn’t pull through, but Tide sure did." 

porated suggestions from the audience. Another of my favorite skits was 
For instance, we were asked to come up. called “How To.” The audience was 
with an unusual Olympic event Some- asked for two things that could be 

one called out dishwashing. So, ac- taught, and then a player had to teach 
companied by hilarious commentary, one event switching instantaneously 
one player competed in high speed to teaching the other every time 
dishwashing. someone yelled “switch”. 

Another skit called “On the Up of The instructions that followed 

My Tongue,” required an event that is combined such unlikely lessons as belly 
taught such as chiving, and then a list dancing and car polishing, making a 

Otter Nonsense: Otterly Hysterical in McCullough. 

Photo by Roberta Stewart 

peanut Ixitter and jelly sandwich and 
waxing your legs, with hysterical re¬ 

The show ended with the audience 
suggesting a random noun, in this case 
Frisbee, and the company then singing 

the frisbee Hues. Each member had to 
arrange impromptu blues lyrics in¬ 
volving a frisbee. 

For anyone who hasn’t seen the 
Otter Nonsense improv group perform 
(although it seemed as if the entire 

school population was there Thursday 
night) - go see them. Lots of talent, lots 
of laughs, and none of the gaps that can 
accompany improvised work. They all 
work very hard to keep the program 
moving, and it does. As Carson would 
say, funny, funny sniff. 

Fried Green Tomatoes: a tasty treat fW note 

The Friends of the Library hon¬ 
ored Middlebury's most recently 
published authors in a reception in 
Starr Library's Abemethy Room on 
Sunday, February 16 from 4 to 6 pm. 
The works celebrated have all been 
published since last March. Special 
Collections Librarian Bob Buckeye 
noted that the library has been host¬ 
ing annual receptions such as this for 
roughly five years, and that mem¬ 
bers of the college’s faculty publish 
an average of twelve books a year. 

Books displayed at the reception 
included Spoilt Children of Empire: 
Westerners inShanghai and the Chi¬ 
nese Revolution of the 1920's by 
Nicholas Gifford of the History De¬ 
partment; Growing Up Country, the 
third book by English professor Don 
Mitchell; Far From Home, a non¬ 
fiction work by the English 
Department's Ron Powers; John 

Dewey: Religious Faith and Demo¬ 
cratic Humanism by Steven 
Rockefeller of the Religion Depart 
ment; The Bread Loaf Anthology: 
Writers on Writing, edited by Jay 
Parini and Robert Pack of the English 
Department; Collection Develop 
ment in College Libraries by loam 
Schneider Hill; Body Stones: AGuidt 
to Experiential Anatomy by Andrei 
Olsen of the Dance Department; i 
work of fiction by English professoi 
Julia Alvarez entitled How tht 
GarciaGirbLostTheir Accents; and 
Nuclear Choices: A Citizen's Guide 
to Nuclear Technology by Richard 
Wolfson of the Physics Department. 
Professors Thomas Beyer and Rich¬ 
ard Cornwall have also had works 
published recently; these, unfortu¬ 
nately were not available for dis- 

takes die over-used conventions of 
murder mystery, friendship and flash¬ 
back and mixes them to create a pow¬ 
erful picture working from daily life. 

Ambiguities and tensions between 
exterior sunny Southern days and 
deeper, stranger, evil forces unfold as 
the film takes its time finishing the 
stories of past and present Finally, 
Fried Green Tomatoes is about stories 
themselves, and the ensuing suspen¬ 
sion of disbelief and selfishness for die 
listener. The movie has the viewer rspt 
because of its subtleties, not its vio¬ 
lence or exaggerated action, and con¬ 
sequently stays in the mind afterward, 
allowing one to draw one’s own con¬ 

Unless you were first in line at 
Bloodsport, you'll love Fried Green 
Tomatoes. / 

By Liz Brewer and Lauren Baker self-realization. Fried Green Tomatoes 

Please go see Fried Green Toma- steers clear of one-dimensional por- 
toes. If you can ignore our generation's frayals of men. Bates’ husband, while 

attraction to the obvious, flashy and inattentive, shows the ability to change, 

transparent in movies which seem like Unfortunately, die film does have 
two-hour stretches of MTV, you will one of those predictable loee-weight 
enjoy this well acted and effective film, makeovers. Another weak part is the 

This is one of those movies that undeveloped lesbian suggestion in die 
causes you to momentarilyforget where relationship between Idgie and her life- 

you are. Kathy Bates’s character loses time best friend Ruth. Ruth and Idgie's 

herself in stories luminously told by rapport, however, is also one of the 

Jessica Tandy. As Ruth tells her sto- film’s strengths. The two have a re¬ 
lies, the viewer also becomes immersed freshingly down to earth interaction 

in the flashbacks of an old woman's that strengthens even the most far- 
past. Mary Stewart Masterson {days fetched plot turns. 

Idgie, a young woman of Tandy's Some will criticize these quirky, 
memorable stories who refuses to con- bizarre developments in a story that 
form to stifling Southemsocicty.Hales’ keeps returning to the harmless South- 
character gleans personal freedom emlifestyle su g gested by the title. Fried 
through these stories of the past. green tomatoes is an unusual dishmade 

Week At A Glance 

•Three Theater 231 films will be shown Thursday. February 20 at 7:30 
in Twilight Auditorium. “The Great Train Robbery," “The Battle of 
Elderbush Gulch,” and “Stagecoach” are three early twentieth-century 

• Edward Jackman, comedian and juggler extraordinaire, will perform for 
MCAB Stitches Comedy Club at Dana Auditorium. Thursday. February 2C 
at 8pm. Tickets are only two dollars at the door. 

•“The Greatest Show on Ice" opens at Nelson Arena on Friday. Febru¬ 
ary 21 at 7pm and Saturday. February 22 at 4:30 pm Don’t miss this 


Star Mill, Middlebury, 388-2755 


Blues Tour- March 9, The Flynn 
Phish- March 12 at The Flynn, $11 
Kenny Rodgers- March 11 


Eric Clapton- “Rush” soundtrack 
Alligator Records- “20th Anniversary 
Widespread Panic- “Space Wrangler” 
Pixies-“Surfer Rosa” 

Phish- “Pictures of Nectar” 

year’s winter carnival ice show. Tickets are $2.25 with college or high 
school ID, $3 25 without and $.75 for children. 

•Come laugh at your friends at the Winter Carnival Night Club, Friday, 
February 21 at 7:30pm and 9pm at McCullough; pink tickets are for the 
early show and green tickets for the late show. 

•The Immediate Theater Experience debuts Sunday. February 23 
at 8pm in the Hepburn Zoo. Subscriptions for the upcoming 8 performances 

can be purchased for $5 at the student information desk. 

•At 7:30 on Monday. February 24. Theater 231 will present four short 

The Pawnshop.” “The Immigrant.” and “Sherlock 

films-“0ne A.M. 

Jr."-at Twilight Auditorium. 

•Acclaimed conductor Alien Shaw will perform a free concert on Thurs 
day. February26 at 8pm at Mead Chapel. 


Hie Fannie (fbnneriythe nameless 21 Cbb) celebntes its grand 
reopening with aGRAFFTTI PARTY on Saturday, February 29th. Bring 
a T-shirt and sodas to hdp ns dec or Me die graffiti wall (and cadi 
other). Come dance and check out the new menu and improved game 
room-Openi n g n i g ht is sponsored by the Senior Class, but all over 21 are 
invited to attend No cover charge. 




he wasnt? \m 

I LIKE X r -- 



To Frash 3rd floor Heptwn (1990-91) 


Goess who? (ha ha) 

G ree t in g s from Paris 

























■go. Mnram! Need I say more? -Awfully good. 
T (A*k Tom) I love you! I’m waving, I nmi you! 





Crampus trivializes sexual violence 

pain, and that unfortunately emotionally and physically, 
seem to be getting worse and Mostlikelysheawokeandcould 
not better. not remember exactly what 

Although there are many ar- happened but recognized unex- 
ticles that should be addressed, plained discomfort in her va- 
I want to talk about ‘Tequila.” gina. 

Again, I do not condemn the 
writing of the article, I only ask 
that we examine exactly what 
this scenario represents; itactu- 
ally was very well portrayed. A 
woman named Bertha goes out 
and drinks too much, notices a 
man she is interested in and to¬ 
gether they return to her room. 

She wakes up the next morning 

with no underwear and no wal- For a day or two, she denied quib and is forced to experi 

* et - anything even happened, con- ence die pain, guih and humili- 

When Bertha goes to the vincing herself that the pain nin»n»r>^ri. 

police, they are unable to help would disappear, blaming her- people get a good laugh_The 

her and the attacker gets away. I self for getting drunk. Eventu- writers obviously think its pretty 

commend the authors for their ally she gets worried and thinks fimny Am gx. 

accuracy in portraying this that maybe he had sex with her horn janiimwi is »«in— aj 

common and horrible campus because she was passed out or vant^eof. and has no power to 

experience. I question, however, perhaps she tried to fight back retaliate. I do not. 

if the authors understand the and she could not She knows Rape is not fumy. Alcohol 

painful reality of what actually she did not say yes. She spends ism is not fumy. Why in a 
happened. Bertha was raped. It weeks going to counseling try society «■»* 

wasnotherfault. Itis not funny, ing to get over the guilt and 

Ironically and unfortunately, 
this is how most rapes on this - __ 

campus happen The woman — _ 

wakes up alone, left to figure ~ ■—_^ 

out what happened. The police .^ 

cannot help her, the man gets ^ tY. \ 

away with it, and some people / 1 s x 

think it is funny. I would like to \ 

ask the writers if they are aware A ^ Ij 

of what happened to this woman fettraMa 2 , IK" 

/ question... if the authors understand Imagine that your daughter or 

the painful reality of what actually 

happened. Bertha was raped. It was not p^n. fear and heipk** 
her fault, ft is no, funny. "toSSSiaL. 

and the sake of ourselves, 
so m et hin g must be done. The 
Middebury Crampus forces us 
to recognize the ignorance aid 
fear that exists in all of us. 

We can not deny it; we must 
deal with k. I beg us all as a 
community, as a campus, as a 
society, and most importantly 
as individuals to examine why 
we feel such fear and why we 
fed it is necessary to always be 
an the attack, hurting and hat 

Alicia Mathewson *92 

disapproved of rough humor. 

When (heard that the costs 
of Crampus publication had 
been covered by Student Ac¬ 
tivities, I was ecstatic. Was 
Student Activities actually 
reversing'its long standing 
policy of fiscal idiocy? Had 
they finally realized that 
spending S3.200 to fly die 
cr i cke t team to Bermuda was 
a co m plete dereliction of ac¬ 
countability? Wat my Stu¬ 
dent Activities Fee actually to 
be used for aomething more 
worthwhile than Cold Duck 
and chqese parties in the 
Chateau? Ahh. the thrill of 

^4 A-*y 

Hunt for diversity 
is sadly misguided 

GDIS?- Goto?... 
Crtoi, ill Mt ill 
wtu>l' mis | 
jsfj'r fnivy 

As Middlebury’s powers As one of the cornerstones 
have turned their rhetorical guns of our admissions policy reveals, 

upon die problem of sexual as- decision makers already know 
sault, they have chosen to release this; but in their zeal to toe the 

•heir frustrated sexual energy current mindless line, they dis- 
by abusing a once noble, but miss logic and consistency. This 

now disgraced, violated, and far defines our need-blind admis- 
from harmless word, skms policy. We admit students 

Middlebury’s aphrodisiac is the regardless of their wealth and 

word diversity, and our defini- promise to fund their financial 
tion of diversity errs enor- need. That is, we strive to make 
mously. At a recent Planning a Middlebury College education 

Committee meeting on campus equally available to both rich 
composition, the panelists used and poor, 
die word so often I feared for Pause and consider the un- 
their health, hoping they had spoken premise which supports 
protection. this policy. It is that in educa- 

Defined correctly, diversity - don, anextemalcharacteristic— 
forms one of the Western here, wealth—has no relevancy 

tradition’s great strengths. De- to aperson's value to the school, 

fined inconecdy and irrespon¬ 
sibly, as it is at Midd, it becomes 
a cheap drug offered to anyone 
here who thinks he has a wound. 

John Stuart Mill gained fame 
by describing free society as a 
“marketplace of ideas” where 
all are considered and the truth 
triumphs. This is true and noble 
diversity. Middlebury diversity 
knows nothing of this. 

Forsaking ideas, we set goals to his ability to excel and con- die most base, aim 

for what percentage of our stu- tribute to the i n tellectual com- unfair means of i 

dents should have a certain skin munity. By voiding monetary people, 

color or live in a certain country impediments, Middlebury ac- Did not the ci 

or area. This is a false, lazy, and knowledges that a person’s movement teach u 

dangerous diversity which sees mental quality and interest (his color does not dak 

individuals as scripted members internal characteristics) are tu- And why would the 

ofa monochrome mass, judging preme, and that we should ignore mail not apply to i 

them not by the contented their external characteristics. urbanity, and—wea 

character or mind, but by the Yet when we turn to diver- Three affect us, 
color of their skin or by some sity, and try to rise above the individual's intdlec 

other external characteristic, erotic disorienting fumes which ordinate the effects 

Middlebury needs to pursue di- spew forth around us and cloud nancial stale, as oar 

versity on the inside, not outside, our discussions, it becomes dear policy resumes, su 

of its students. that we embrace the exact op- (caatmmad e 

Women’s hockey 
deserves support 

If Middlebury were to invite two judges 
to speak, would it be more diverse to 
invite Clarence Thomas and Robert 
Bork, or to invite Clarence Thomas and 
Thurgood Marshall? 

about Middlebury 
’a hockey was die level 
mg: it is obv i o ua that 

Off Campus: Rebate or Rip-off? 




- Established 1905 - 


Peter H. Walsh 

Managing Editor 

Lisa M. Balaschak 

Business Manager 

Jennifer Partan 

Production Manager 

Greg Pitts 

News Editor 

Cathy Lee 

News Editor 

Sara Switzer 

Features Editor 

Peter Harris 

Aits Editor 

Hillary Brown 

Sports Editor 

Neall Currie 

Opinions Editor 

Jake Ciuin 

Opinions Editor 

Nick Waller 

Science Editor 


Photo Editor 


Photo Editor 

Duffy Thompson 

Contributing Editor 

Mara P. Gorman 

AMrtising Manager 

Adam Greenberger 

Technical Consultant 

Zsolt Tolgyesi 

News Assistant 

Janine Zacharia 

News Assistant 

John Doty 

News Assistant 

Kami Bedard 

Features Assistant 

Peter Greauex 

Arts Assistant 

Christa Hawryluk 

Sports Assistant 

Erin O'Connell 

Opinions Assistant 

Lisa Flaherty 

Photo Assistant 

Roberta Stewart 

Production Assistant 

Justin Douglas 

Production Assistant 

Katharine Loos 

Production Assistant 

Allison Wang 

Production Assistant 

Ben Small 


Larrisa Schwartz 

Copy Editor 

Jennifer Normandin 

Copy Editor 

Jean Hudson 

Copy Editor 

Josh Barnes 


The Middlefawy Camput (USPS 556-060), die 
student newspaper of Mkfcflebuiy College, is 
published in Middlebury. VT by the Student 
Government Association of Middlebuty College. 
Pu b lication is every Thursday of the academic year, 
except during official college vacation periods and 
final examinations. Editorial ml business o ffic es 
are in Hepburn Hall Annex. Middlebury College. 

The M i d dl ebury Campus is produced on an 
Apple Macintosh netwesk with Aldus Pagemaker 
4.0, and is printed by Denton Publishers. 
Elizabethtown. NY. 

Advertising dradlinr (including classifieds and 
personals) is Saturday at noon for the next week's 
issue. The 1991-19992 advertising rase is $3.75 per 
column inch. $3 JO camera ready. Mailing adekew: 
The Middletnny Campus, Drawer 30. Middlebury 
College, Middlebury. VT 05753. Office phones: 
(802) 388-3711 ext. 5736.5737.5738 (Editorial); 
exL 5739 (Business). Please addbess distibulion 
concerns to the Business Manager. 

Adcbess all letters to the editor to the Opinions 
Editor. The Middlebury Canopus will not accept or 
print anonymous letters and reserves the right to 
edit all Opinions letters. The op ini on s cxp rrssed in 
the Opinions SectiorCreviews md other 
commentary, are views of he individual authors 
and do not necessarily reflect the opi ni on s of The 
Middlebury Campus. 

First class postage paid at Middlebury. VT 
05753. Subscription rate: $30 per year within the 
United Stales; $50 per year overseas. 

During J-term the administration announced an 8% increase in the comprehensive 
fee for die 1992-1993 academic year. Recently, the Senior Staff of the college decided 
that the room and board rebate for students living off-campus should be raised by 
$150, an improvement of only 5% and the first increase in several years. 

With this larger rebate, Middlebury will offer a total of $3,150 for students living 

At Dartmouth, students living off campus this year receive a refund of $5,379; at 
Williams, $5,210; and at Connecticut College, off-campus students receive $5,370. 

These facts are not exceptions and the entire student body deserves an explanation. 

The Student Government Association (SGA) recently passed the Off-Campus 
Rebate Bill requesting that the college explain its rebate by presenting a breakdown 
of the costs associated with room and board expenses. In light of the rebates offered 
at these (and other) comparable New England schools, the college must comply with 
the SGA's request and explain the logic used to arrive at this 5% figure and the total 
rebate amount. 

Unless the college can justify otherwise, there should be a direct correlation** 
between the percentage increases for the comprehensive fee and the off-campus 

While we understand that it is necessary to limit the number of students living off 
campus in order to prevent real estate values in Middlebury from becoming prohibitive 
to local residents, there is no need to create an economic disadvantage for those 
students who do live off-campus. 

Why then does the college discourage those students with off-campus privileges 
by restricting them financially? 

The college can only explain this low rebate by providing the student body with 
a breakdown of the expenses which it claims will equal $3,150 for next year, and it 
must justify it in terms of realistic expenses of students trying to survive on their own. 

■ . * / - 

$40,000 by the year 2000? 

In recent years, Middlebury College has undergone a transformation of character, 
in the composition of its student body, its appearance, and its intensified atmosphere 
of academic competitiveness. Now, students who have witnessed these changes are 
offered the opportunity to direct the plans that will model the college for the next 

The Planning Committee report is entering its final phases. Included in the ten year 
outline are the ideas and proposals of members of the college community who have 
worked for months to create a long-term plan for the college. 

But the report is still open for revision. 

Among some of the more controversial items included in the report are proposals 
to consolidate academic departments, increase "need blind" financial aid, reduce the 
number of faculty employed by the college, and increase the comprehensive fee to 
$39,603 by the academic year 2001-2002. The implementation of these and other 
proposals will shape the nature of the college — for good or bad — through the next 

We urge members of the college community to read the report and to take part in 
its finalization before its submission to the Board of Trustees in May. Students, faculty, 
and staff will again be invited to attend open discussions on policy changes throughout 
the spring term. Awareness of these designs and participation in the planning process 
gives the community the power to help shape the college's future. This is a unique 

Editor's note: The Middlebury Campus and its staff are 
in no way affiliated with The Middlebury Crampus. the 
Cramp us is a completely separate publication. „ 


(continued form page 17) 

•Iso subordinate other environ¬ 
mental and hereditary factors. 
If not, then education has little 

Knowledge of reality dem¬ 
onstrates the foolishness of 
Middlebuty’s definition of di¬ 
versity. Where is true diversity 
when Ted Kennedy and Jesse 
Jackson discuss politics? If 
Middlebury were to invite two 

American Indians? Let us be 

The oqty answer is that ex¬ 
ternal characteristics may influ¬ 
ence, but do not determine, 
thought Martin Luther King 
said this thirty years ago, and it 
was by no means anew thought 
then. But in one of history’s 
great ironies, Middlebury has 
ravished, twisted, and maligned 
this obvious truth into its oppo¬ 
site, while claiming to share 
King’s goaL 

...we set “goals** for what percentage of 
our students should have a certain skin 
color or live in a certain country or 

How to find a Feb without trying 

“I've been a-choldng like a 
nursery tree, when it outgrows 
the wire band of its name tag”- 
Robert Rost. In the true spirit 
of emulation, it seemed the only 
way to write about Fehism here 
at Midd, or anything here at 
Midd for dial matter, t’would 
seem, was to pull out the Frost 
Anthology and dig up something 
that fits. For anyone who wants 
to know what it is like to sit on 
your hands in suburban America 
for seven months while the rest 

Feb Amoeba. Wehave this habit 
of absorbing every Feb in our 
path, forming some giant, un¬ 
breakable Barricade o' Febs, all 
united in die common goal of 
not getting lost. 

2) Walking Around (indi¬ 
vidually): Look for that shell¬ 
shocked, semi-green expression 
we ah know and love as Proctor 
Face. Hey, some of us have 
been living on home cookin ’ for 
the past seven months. This 
might take some getting used to. 

Fehs travel in packs, known as Feblings, 
or the less affectionate but more 
accurate Feb Amoeba. We have this 
habit of absorbing every Feb in our 
path, forming some giant, unbreakable 
Barricade o* Febs, all united in the 
common goal of not getting lost 

whence they came, those were 
Febs. Qr if your House i& hav¬ 
ing a party, and thirty or so kids 
come in, drink all the beer, and 
Iboidisappearfirom whence they 
came, those too were Febs. 

6) In the North Dorms: There 
are ahandful of us in isolation in 
this antiseptic structure, but 
seeing as no one I’ve ever spo¬ 
ken to has ever been there before, 
you'll just have to take my word 
for it 

7) In Pearsons: Everywhere. 
Everywhere. Alas, my hallmates 
and all other Juniors and Sopho¬ 
mores of Pearsons, we are ev¬ 

8) In Battell, Allen, or 

With die advent of Febru¬ 
ary 1992 and the New Hamp¬ 
shire primaries, the race to the 
Democratic National Conven¬ 
tion is well under way. The 
horses are on the track and have 
left the starting gate. 

Rill Clinton 

Stewart: Mixed in carefully with 
the rest of the Freshman popula¬ 
tion, these are the only Febs 
who can name more than four 
September freshmen, high 
school classmates not included. 

Should none of this seem to 
help, then perhaps we are infil¬ 
trating just a little too well for 
your own personal safety and 
comfort. You never really can 
be sure when you're going to 
bump into us, but then again, 
there's nothing like a hundred 
or so new overly-excited and 
rather naive targets lurking in 
the distance, just waiting to be 
lead astray. 

Mike Lias *95 

call in and pledge donations, 
thus giving political access to 
the non-moneyed interests. 
These are not the actions of a 
front-runner. Without the funds 
and die support of the wealthy 
and influential, Jerry Brown 

judges to speak, would it be 
more diverse to invite Clarence 
Thomas and Robert Boric, or to 
invite Clarence Thomas and 
Thurgood Marshall? Certainly 
the latter, yet we would be invit¬ 
ing two blacks rather than one 
black and one white (or would 
that be on African-American and 
one European-American?) 

How can Ronald Reagan, an 
American man, and Margaret 
Thatcher, aBritish woman, have 
identical politics? 

Why do Israelis feud over 
Palestinian treatment and West 
Bank settlement? Are not they 
all Jews? (And why do not we 
have goals for the percent of 
Jews, or for more favored groups 
such as homosexuals and 


(continued from page 17) 
taken some small notice of your 
efforts and those efforts are 
therefore not completely inef¬ 

For those of you who were 
mocked and continue to sit in 
righteous indignation, I hear¬ 
ken unto thee—“descend from 
thy towers of ivory! Men were 
not made to live in quarantined 
content above the floating 

to trying to restore the Ameri¬ 
can democratic process to 
something close to its idealized 
form. The fact is that Jerry 
Brown it not just running for the 
Democratic Party nomination or 
the Presidency. 

If we have inflexibly fixed 
our hearts upon goals, let us at 
least make our categories rel¬ 
evant, based upon a student's 
thoughts rather than his skin &r 
origin. Aim for equal numbers 
of, say, Christians and atheists, 
Conservatives and Liberals, 
feminists and misogynists, etc. 
Above all, diversity’s current 
definition must go. 

It is irresponsible to judge 
by appearances anywhere, but 
nowhere more so than at a lib¬ 
eral arts college, where the mind 
should reign. It is at this liberal 
arts college, more than in soci¬ 
ety, where we assault the mind 
for the sake of noxious social 

Kevin Marshall >94 

clouds, but on the earth, beneath 
those clouds. And as those 
clouds doth on occasion shed 
much rain, so man was destined 
to live in the quagmires of mud 
which they spawned. For we 
should be as swine who wallow 
in the foulest of filth while 
maintaining a happy disposi¬ 
tion." Who knows, some poor 
fool may even cast pearls before 
us and we could gaze at them in 
utter incomprehension simply 
for the sake of spite. 

one stuck their neck out. And 
to have it be a seasoned politi¬ 
cal veteran is even better. Many 
Americans, including I, have 
become dismayed, disillu¬ 
sioned, and thoroughly dis¬ 
heartened by the sad stale of the 

of academia is out to play, this 
quote fits about as well as my 
every possession did in the back 
of mom’s station wagonacoupie 
weeks ago. I didn’t go to Eu¬ 
rope, Ididn‘tgoMexico,IdKln’t 
go to Fiji. I pursued no knowl¬ 
edge, helped not my feDow man, 
nor made any pretense of an 
attempt to save the world over 
the course of one afternoon. But 
I sure wouldn’t have minded. 
You can really only stare at the 
ceiling for three months at a 
time in betweenTV breaks. I’ve 
decided. But this isn't an article 
about me, this is an article about 

Boys and girls, wehave ar¬ 
rived. And since I know you all 
want to come find us somehow 
(p!ease?X I have prepared this 

handy guide to clip and save for 
your dining pleasure. I like to 
call it The Feb Handbook of 
the Universe and Other Such 
Large Things", but you can just 
call k The Campus guide of 
“How to find a Feb." 

1) Walking Around (in 
groups): Febs travel in packs, 
known as Feblings, or the less 
affertiosiatr but more accurate 

3) In Proctor: There are two 
possibilities. Listen for that fa¬ 
miliar sound of a tray hurling to 
the ground at sub-sonic speeds, 
die contents of which spread 
oyer a fifty-foot diameter upon 
impact, and there’ll be a Feb 
standing in die center of said 
diameter. Or, and this is fail¬ 
safe, just go upstairs in Upper 
Proctor, and you’ll find us. 
There’s nothing quite as hu¬ 
miliating for the ego just as you 
dunk you're finally settled as 
walking around the dining hah 
and not recongniring a single 
face. At least upstairs there 
aren’t as many peo p le, and when 
you do look around they tend to 
be all Febs anyhow. It keeps 
things on levels that we can deal 

4) At the Library: Don’t 
know. Never been. 

5) At the Social Houses: 
Once again, two possibilities. If 
your respective House is com¬ 
muning for an evening of activi¬ 
ties in and among yourselves, 
and suddenly thedoor flies open, 
three of four drankards stumble 
in, realize there's no party, cough 
loudly, and disappear from 

par 2* 

The Middlebury Camput 




jar VIABLE 7 





TS~ :r *\ 





Chow about you, ' 
governor? J 

Jr / 1% WOULD BE A 


Thursday, February 2*, 1992 

Big Brother needed for great fifteen year old 
son. Likes sports (esp. football) and jazz (trum¬ 
peter). Midd Hockey fan. See or call Ann 
Wheeler, Munroe 201, ext 5239 if you would like 
to be a friend. 

DCDC, Eyore, Al, Pucch, Cin, Jen, En, Ice 
cold hips. 

thanx for a great time - it was a trip and a half! 

-le juif 


It’s longer than an extra long and wider than a 
double wide. 

-60 minutes (discussing mobile homes) 

OK, I woke up this morning and had to take an 
inventory of my body. I got a C- 
-Sunday morning 



Km. c. 
















What’s up with all these people, it’s 8:00 in 
the morning. Screw class. I’m going back to bed. 
-First day of class in Proctor 

I was a freshman... 

I was an innocent slut 

I was a promiscuous prude. 

-a reminiscing junior. 

“Aren’t you turned on at ALL?” -Stewart 

Sorry I didn’t call, but I forgot it was my 

“ I’m on my way to the extra help session for 
‘shake and bake’” 

-1st week of classes in Stewart 

Can I interview you? 

Sure, what for? 

My mental illness class. 

“Will, why does that point to the right? I 
would think it would hurt your girlfriend." - 
Painter 307 

"My parents get this paper, I don’t want them 
to read this stuff!" 

-previously fearless Campus staff-worker. 



/C ~ % MESSAGE? (gt 





I DO... 


I "] 1-900-426-1IIZ 



W lilSlSBtSI r 


YOU,SIR. CALL 1-800- 

SENA10R 426-! HZ? 



(2? 3 fitLstpa 

“My lungs are watering!” 

- someone somewhere in Amsterdam 

FUNDRAISER. WE’re looking for student 
organizations who would like to make $500- 
$1500 for a one week marketing project on 
campus. Must be organized and hard working. 
Call 800-592-2121, Betsy ext. 114 or Megan ext. 

[f you've thought 
it, heard it, or 
dreamt it, 

We'll print it! 
Send it to: 

rhe Middlebury 
Campus: Drawer 30 

Of the race now? 

1 / N0.S0MB0N& 






Because trained 

operators art. If \ 
1 Standing by. 

iisi f 

e M I e